Is it over when a girl dumps you, or is there any chance she will come back?
Let’s talk about a few factors that will have the biggest influence on whether she comes back to you or not.
Does she have a lot of friends?
So, why does this matter?
It matters because she is going to have an easier time moving on from you if she has a lot of friends.
The more people she has around her, the more emotional support she will have available.
When the girl can rely on her friends for emotional support, she is not going to be so attached to you.
For example, let’s say you had a lot of friends, and you lose one of your friends.
You are not going to struggle to get over him (or her) when you have a bunch of other people you can hang out with.
I hope you don’t take this as me saying you should seclude a girl from her family and friends in a future relationship just so she becomes emotionally dependant on you.
That is just going to be toxic for both you and the girl.
Rather, I want you to get a very clear picture of the reality, so you can accurately assess if you have a good chance of getting her back.
That being said, she is actually going to have an easier time getting over you if you guys had a healthy relationship where your entire lives didn’t revolve around each other.
On the other hand, there is a good chance she will struggle to get over you if you guys had a toxic relationship where you guys spent every second together.
When you have been her entire universe for a long period of time, you essentially become her drug.
Needless to say, the withdrawal effect is a lot more potent when you have become fully dependant on her emotionally.
How long was the relationship?
The longer your relationship lasted with her, the more likely she is going to feel the urge to contact you.
When she shares a lot of memories with you, she is going to think about you more, and she is going to miss you more as well.
If, on the other hand, she has only known you for a short while, she is not too emotionally invested in you.
In such a case, it is going to be easy for her to move on and find another man.
So, the duration of your relationship matters when it comes to assessing if a girl will come back.
But more importantly, do you guys share a lot of amazing memories together that will make it difficult for her to erase you out of her life?
Did you validate her fully when she wanted to break up?
This is a mistake a lot of men make.
When a girl wants to break up, many men are quick to tell the girl how they can’t live without her and that she is everything.
I’ve made the same mistake when my first girlfriend wanted to end the relationship.
I tried to hold onto her by telling her how much she means to me.
I thought that would make her realize how much I care for her, and she would come back to me.
But the more I tried to get her back, the more she pushed me away.
It was only when I stopped chasing her, she came back crawling for my attention.
So, why did she feel no desire to come back when I was chasing her but changed her mind as soon as I stopped pursuing her?
It is because we tend to lose interest in others when we believe they are fully sold on us.
We naturally desire things that are hard to get, and we value something that we had to work for.
And that is where I messed up.
I made a mistake of fully validating my ex-girlfriend when she did not deserve it, and she started chasing me only when I took that validation away by going no contact on her.
What was she like in the past?
Her past behavior is the best predictor of her future behavior.
How did she act in the past when something similar happened between you and her?
Was she the one to reach out to you first, or were you always the one to beg for her to stay?
How did she act in the past with her ex-boyfriends?
Did she have a habit of reaching out to her exes, or was she the type to erase them out of her life once the relationship is over?
While people can change, it is unlikely they are going to change in a short period of time.
For this reason, her recent past usually serves as the most accurate predictor of how she is going to act in the future.
What you should do?
So, what is the best thing you can do when a girl has left you?
Should you just wait for her to come back like a good little boy?
The only correct answer is to stop pursuing her.
Nothing makes you feel more pathetic than chasing a girl who is not into you.
While ignoring a girl may or may not work (to get her back), you are almost guaranteed to repel her away if you relentlessly chase a girl who does not want you.
The best thing you can do for yourself is to completely ignore her for the time being.
Cut her out of your life and focus on increasing your value as a man.
And a breakup can often be the best catalyst to upgrade your value as a man.
Pain is a great motivator for you to get off your butt and do something to better your life.
So, re-direct your focus to self rather than dwelling over your past.
Improve yourself in every area including health, wealth, and knowledge.
Don’t just come up with general plans and goals as they are sure to fail.
Set specific goals on what you want to achieve (and what type of man you want to become).
Do something every single day that will help you move closer to the type of man you want to become.
Your ex will soon be craving for your attention.
But you won’t care even if she doesn’t.
The chances are that by the time your ex-girlfriend wants to come back to you, you will have moved on from her anyway because you’ve learned to value yourself over anyone else.