What is it about bad boys that girls find so appealing?
Why can’t you just be a nice guy who genuinely wants the best for a girl… and attract her with your sincere kindness..?
Well.. there are several different reasons for this.
And there is a good chance your girl (or the girls you meet in the future) will cheat on you with those evil bad boys… if you are not aware of what makes them so appealing.
Anyway, let’s dive right in…
One of the reasons why bad boys are so attractive to girls is their willingness to be…
They are not afraid to express themselves as how they feel.
When they feel strongly about something, they are not afraid to express it.
When something a girl does annoys them, they are not afraid to express it.
They are “real” with girls they interact with.
On the other hand, nice guys are usually extremely careful to not offend girls.
While treating girls with utmost respect will surely make her like you enough… to put you in her gay best friend category… it most certainly will not make her want to do naughty things with you.
This absence of polarity means it is very hard for girls to feel any strong pull (emotion) toward you.
But, bad boys are different.
There is just something about them that makes the woman want to chase for their attention.
And that leads to the second point…
Think about it.
Nice guys constantly shower girls with compliments and “feel good” emotions.
Over time, girls get de-sensitized to it. And validation from you (..nice guy) really does not mean much at all.
Bad boys rarely ever give validation to girls.
If anything, they would often borderline insult girls (in a playful way).
So when they finally do give that validation, it means a lot more to girls.
What do you think will give you more emotional high?
Getting likes on your social media posts by some random average girls… or… getting likes from a celebrity you absolutely love?
Which also means they are more exciting.
They do whatever they want whenever they want.
We don’t just say variety is the spice of life for no reason.
Girls love it when a guy knows how to be spontaneous and do things on a whim.
That is what creates excitement in life after all.
Nice guys, on the other hand, love to live a very structured and predictable life.
Hit the gym at this specific time… do my work at this specific time… have sex at this specific time.
This means they are very reliable and make a great “husband-material”.
But it doesn’t really put you into a category of a guy that a girl would do naughty things in the club bathroom… within five minutes of meeting him.
Not saying that is the type of a guy you should aspire to be… but it may piss you off a little when you realize she’s done that with another dude while she made you wait three months for sex.
Imagine going to the movies and the entire movie consists of just all happy positive vibe… with no conflicts nor struggles.
You probably wouldn’t enjoy the movie too much.
And that is essentially what nice guys are doing to girls.
They provide only one source of emotion (Positive/charming).
And when the girl is feeling that itch for other sources of emotion, she is going to look for them from other guys.
Bad boys are unpredictable and not afraid to say what is on their mind.
They are not afraid to take girls on an “emotional rollercoaster”.
Girls become addicted to those feelings… like how they become addicted to shitty shows they just can’t stop watching for whatever reason.
The answer is quite simple.
You just have to be “real”.
I used to always struggle with expressing what was truly on my mind.
I was so afraid of what people may think of me when I say what is really on my mind.
Maybe they would hate me… maybe they would not want to be my friends anymore… maybe everyone will think I am such a loser.
I eventually came to realize living my life in constant fear of others judgment did not bring any sort of fulfillment.
Even when people liked me… it wasn’t “real” me.
It was just a fake version of me I was portraying to the outside world.
As I became better and better at expressing what I truly think and feel around others… I naturally began to attract the right type of people and repelled those who aren’t the right fit for me.
And I became a lot happier as a result.
You really need to be honest yourself.
Are you really being your true self around others?
Or are you putting on a fake-mask because you are afraid of others judging you if you show your real self?
This is also the reason why most nice guys aren’t actually so nice after all.
Think about it.
What do we value most in a relationship whether it be a relationship with friends or a relationship with the opposite sex?
For most people, they would say it is honesty.
So you are essentially breaching the most fundamental principle of a healthy relationship – by refusing to be real around others.
I want to end this article with one simple advice if you are so accustomed to being a nice guy that you don’t even know where to start.
Start off by saying at least one statement of disagreement whenever you engage in social interaction with others.
And do this for the next twenty-one days (about how long it takes to form a new belief).
This can literally be as simple as the example below.
Someone: “This city is beautiful”
You: “I disagree… (then elaborate)”
You don’t have to sound all asshole when you disagree. You can even disagree with a slight smile.
But you are not allowed to say you were just joking to neutralize the feeling of discomfort you feel inside you.
Doing this will re-wire your brain into realizing it is absolutely okay to disagree with people.
Remember… this is just a temporary training wheel to re-wire your brain.
The goal is not to disagree with people for the sake of disagreeing (except during the first twenty-one days) – but rather to become a man who is not afraid to express his true self to the world.
Anyway, that’s it for today.
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Till next time.
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