When A Girl Looks At You

So, what do you do when a girl looks at you?

But, I first need to emphasize what you definitely should NOT do when a girl looks at you.

And I notice this pattern among a lot of shy and awkward guys (and also a LOT of Asians and Indians).

So, what is that one habit that you have that will completely ruin your chance before you even have a chance to go up to her and talk?

It is that rapid, flinching in your eyes and your head movement.

It is one thing to first break eye contact when a girl looks at you.

It is totally another thing to do it in an erratic way.

So, why is this such a deal breaker?

Because this is a dead giveaway to girls that you are nervous by her presence.

It instantly makes you appear weak and un-grounded.

Just think about times when you met someone for the first time.

And all of their behaviors seemed rather abrupt and looked very unstable.

What was your initial impression of them?

You probably didn’t exactly think the person seems confident and carry himself with pride.

That is exactly how a girl feels when she sees a guy who moves in a way that seems sporadic un-grounded.

So, what would be my advice?

Stay relaxed and calm when she looks at you

It is to do everything in a way that is “relaxed” and “smooth”.

I know a lot of dating coaches tell you to “slow” down everything.

While slowing down the speed at you move and talk certainly can help for some people.

That should NOT be your priority.

It is still very possible to walk fast or move fast while giving off that confident energy.

Think about professional athletes.

They move FAST but they do so in a rather elegant way that makes them appear confident.

I’m sure you’ve seen a guy who walks slow but in a way that makes him look like he has a stick up his ass.

And you definitely do NOT want to be that guy.

So, you want to ensure there is zero try-hardness in the way you move and talk.

And the best way to eliminate that is by being relaxed and calm.

How then do you stay relaxed and calm?

I have covered this in my previous article but I’ll mention it again here since repetition is the mother of all skill.

The best way for you to stay relaxed and feel comfortable in your own skin is to shift your focus from yourself to another person.

You are feeling so tense and nervous when you talk to that girl because you subconsciously feel like she would be judging everything you do or say.

And it’s because most of your focus is on “yourself”.

You feel like she can see every little bit of nervous tension you feel that’s running through your entire body.

You feel like she is carefully observing every little weird quirk about you.

What you have to do is to completely shift your focus to that girl standing in front of you.

And actually listen to what she says.

When I say listen, I mean really listen.

To the point you can hear every little subtle change in her tonality and emotions conveyed in her tone.

When you are able to do this, you no longer even have that mental capacity to worry about your own insecurities.

In fact, YOU actually become the one who’s judging her (although I definitely would not recommend you to adopt such mindset but you get my point…).

YOU become the one who is evaluating her.

In fact, this is what a lot of top Hollywood actors are taught to get out of their head.

Now that we’ve covered what you shouldn’t be doing, let’s move onto what you CAN do when a girl looks at you.

The first one is very standard advice.

You hold eye contact, smile, walk up to her and introduce yourself.

Pretty much what 99.9% of dating coaches would recommend you to do.

And this is certainly not a bad way to approach a girl who gives you that look although I do think it is a rather boring way.

In reality, there is a whole bunch of things you can do depending on how you’re feeling in that moment she looks at you.

So, let’s talk about a few of those.

What to do when a girl looks at you

Say you are in that mood to be cheeky and playful with a girl.

You may give her that, “What are you looking at?” type of look in a playful way.

This can be a great expression to make if you can pull it off.

Because things can progress a LOT quicker if you start off your interaction with that playful undertone.


You may also give her that, “You naughty girl… you were checking me out eh?” type of look.

This is almost guaranteed to make her emotionally react in some way.

As I consistently mention in a lot of my other articles, there’s no attraction unless you can arouse some sort of emotion in a girl (Unless you have beautiful enough face to arouse strong emotion in a girl…).

If you’ve got the look, you may even go for that bad boy, serial killer type of look.

But I’ll be honest… I probably wouldn’t recommend this look for most guys.

Simply because most of us don’t have the look for it.

You don’t necessarily have to have that look of James Bond for you to pull this off.

It does, however, make it easier if you happen to be her type.

It really comes down how you are feeling at that moment when a girl looks at you.

If you feel like being playfully challenging then stay true to that emotion and show that in your expression.

If you feel like giving that cheeky look then stay true to that and show her that side of yours.

Anyway, that’s it for today.

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Till next time.

About the Author Jon Go

I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.