So what is that most attractive personality trait in a guy who is not exactly the best looker?
In my opinion, this personality trait is by far one of the most important traits to cultivate if you want to have success in your dating life… or success in any area of your life for that matter.
Actually, I would go as far as saying this is probably the most important trait for your happiness as well.
Before I started adopting “this” attitude toward life, It was as if I was living but not living.
I was constantly letting others opinion and judgment about me affect my action.
So what exactly am I talking about?
It is your ability to maintain the attitude of…
“Nothing is a big deal whatever life throws at me”
The girl rejects you? Eh.. not a big deal.
She calls you ugly? Eh.. not a big deal.
She cheats on you? Eh.. not a big deal.
Life still goes on.
You essentially have to develop that callous in your brain as David Goggins calls it.
So why is this so vital to your overall well being and productivity?
Take a moment and think about all the times you made bad decisions in your life.
You would probably notice a pattern that those events almost always coincided with the times when you were in an emotionally heightened state.
Just imagine if you were to emotionally react to every single event that triggers you even to a slight degree.
You would not be able to channel your frigging focus on anything that matter.
Going off on a slight tangent, this is one of the reasons why it helps to have your purpose as your priority over women.
Because you will then be spending less time worrying about what these women think about you and more time focused on a bigger picture (aka your purpose).
But I’ll be honest with you…
I still do not believe in the whole, “focus on your purpose and the right woman will come” philosophy unless your purpose somehow includes a whole lot of fame and status in return.
I do. however, believe your purpose definitely has to be your top priority over women.
The problem is when you make women your utmost priority, you end up handing over all your power to them.
They are now in charge of your emotion, thoughts, and feelings.
But, on the other hand, I do firmly believe in men striving to get their dating life handled while simultaneously working on their purpose (or one at a time).
Because simply focusing on your purpose alone is often not enough for you to eradicate that attachment toward whatever girl you are crushing on.
Sure. having goals and going after your purpose is at the very top of what makes you feel alive and it definitely gives you that incredible sense of fulfillment.
But at the same time, a sexual desire is one of those very core desires that is hard for us to ignore.
And that means no matter how successful you get or how muscular you get, you will always have that voice in the back of your head telling you what a failure you are if you don’t get your dating life handled.
If you can silence those voices with meditation and telling yourself to disregard hoes and solely focus on your path, then I applaud you for that and wish you the best of luck.
What I have personally found, however, is that it is easier to simply learn how to be an attractive dude as opposed to trying to repress your desire to get with girls.
Once you prove to yourself you have the ability to get the type of girl you want, you feel less compulsion to go after girls all the time.
And this once again ties back to the initial topic of the article.
For you to excel in any areas of your life, you simply have to go through a ton of failures and traumas.
And if you care too much for each and every little setback you experience, you are simply not going to make it to the finish line.
Now… that is the “primary” reason why you must adopt “whatever happens, happens and it’s all part of the process”
But having this attitude also makes you incredibly attractive to women.
Instead of going into all the explanations about why women find you more attractive when you care less, let me try to paint a picture in your head in a way it’s easy for you to understand.
Have you ever come across a person who was way too friendly… way too engaged… way too hyper?
If you have… you can probably recall being weirded out by the person. You probably felt he or she was too much… or creepy etc.
And that is pretty much how a girl feels when you are emitting this try-hard energy by showing too much care.
You’ve probably heard girls say how some guys are really weird and creepy.
Trying way too frigging hard is a great way to give off that creepy vibe.
Even if you say obnoxious stuff, when you deliver it in a way that shows you do not care how he or she reacts, your creepiness will be reduced substantially.
Your ability to engage another person while not appearing as a try-hard is something that takes time to develop especially if you are starting out learning about this whole social interaction thing with a high level of social anxiety as I once had.
But as with anything, the first step to change is having enough self-awareness to realize where you are fugging up.
Let me sum up this article by re-emphasizing this one more time.
Any time you feel nervous about something, remind yourself this.
No matter what happens, it is not a big frigging deal.
It is not a big deal if she has a boyfriend and doesn’t want to give you her number.
It is not a big deal if she flakes on you on the day you are supposed to meet her.
It is not a big deal if she says you are an ugly looking creep.
It is not a big deal if you can’t get your dick up while she’s begging for you to enter her.
Nothing is a big frigging deal.
Please log in again. The login page will open in a new tab. After logging in you can close it and return to this page.