Stop Chasing Her

In this article, you will learn about why and when you should stop chasing a girl.

You will also learn some of the most effective ways to get her to chase you.

Make sure you don’t miss the last section of this article as it is singlehandedly the most powerful way to get a girl to chase you.

This is why you should stop chasing her 

Let’s first briefly talk about why it is so important for you to stop chasing a girl who shows a lack of interest.

I want you to answer this question for me.

Think about the time something just fell into your lap without you having to work for it, whether it be a girl who fell in love with you at first sight, an exam you did well without having to study for it, or an item you got for free.

How long did you value those things?

If I had to guess, you probably didn’t value those for very long.

Your brain is wired to value things more when you had to work for them.

If you only have to put a minimal effort into getting something, you are most likely going to take it for granted.

So, how does this relate to why you should stop chasing a girl to make her want you?

Let’s say you’ve only known a girl for a short time, and you go out of your way to please her in any and every way possible.

You drive an hour to her place to pick her up, and you take her to an expensive restaurant on a first date.

And you let her know daily how beautiful she is and how you can’t imagine a future without her.

How do you think she would feel?

Here is the list of a few thoughts that may potentially cross her mind.

1. She will think you are way too needy and desperate

Do you think a girl wants to be with a man whose entire life revolves around her?

You are going to end up putting way too much pressure on her and drive her away.

2. She is going to assume you must not have a lot of options for you to become so easily attached to her.

No woman wants to be with a man who loves her because he can’t find anyone else.

She is not going to feel any attraction toward you if she feels going on a date with you is like donating to a homeless person.

3. You will likely remind her of all of the other creepy men who approached her in the past with a fake nice guy mask.

There is a good chance she is going to automatically categorize you as one of them.

Do this if she wants you now that you stopped chasing her 

So, you stopped chasing her, and now she wants you.

What do you do with that?

It is important for you to think rationally under such a circumstance.

Right now, you probably want her back because you still miss her.

But, you need to sit down and really think about if that is going to bring you happiness in the long run.

If you constantly have to play games with her to get her to chase and win her back, is it really worth the effort?

A girl that wants you back when you stop chasing, is likely going to be the type of girl who constantly seeks attention and validation from men.

If you don’t do anything with your life, and you are ready to spend all of your time with her, then you guys may very well be a match made in heaven.

Otherwise, it is simply not going to be worth the effort to keep her in your life.

I made this same exact mistake with my first girlfriend when she wanted to come back after I cut off contact with her.

I accepted her back into my life because I was still lonely and miserable at the time.

Everything was fine for a short while, but the same problems that initially drove us apart started to re-emerge.

Because I didn’t have the courage to cut off ties with her, I ended up wasting one more year of my life with her that I could’ve spent with someone else who is a better fit for me.

So, before you rush into your decision, I want you to really take the time to think if you see a future with her.

If you are honest with yourself, the answer would be a clear no in most cases.

This is when to stop chasing her 

So, when should you stop chasing her?

And to be honest, the correct answer is that you should’ve never chased her in the first place.

It is one thing to desire a girl, it is another thing to chase her when she doesn’t reciprocate.

The latter usually comes from a place of neediness, and it will repel girls away from you.

A good rule of thumb to follow is to stop chasing a girl who does not reciprocate your level of interest.

Let me give you a hypothetical scenario to better illustrate this point.

Let’s say a girl cancels a date at the last minute.

There can be two ways you can respond to this.

1. You don’t stand up for yourself.

You chase her by telling her how much you want to see her, and you let her know you’d happy to see her whenever she is available.

2. You let her know that she doesn’t seem to be too eager to see you judging by her behavior.

You tell her it is okay (as in you are more than happy to walk away) if she is not committed to this relationship as much as you are.

Expressing your willingness to walk away is one of the most powerful ways you can get a girl to chase you.

She stopped chasing me 

So, you stopped chasing her by cutting off all contact.

You thought that was going to make her chase you, but you still do not hear anything back from her after a few days, or even a few weeks.

What went wrong?

Here is what you need to realize.

Not every girl is going to start to chase you when you stop showing interest.

Some girls will stop chasing because they’ve found a better option.

Some will stop chasing because they are too busy with their lives.

You need to accept that it is a possibility for a girl to disengage when you stop chasing her.

And this is also why you do not want to stop chasing a girl as a tactic to get her back.

Rather, your mindset should be that you value yourself and your time too much for you to be wasting your time on someone who does not feel the same way about you.

Here is my advice if you are really determined to re-ignite interest in a girl who has lost interest.

This is how you make a woman chase 

This section is about how you can stop being the one to always pursue, and make a woman chase you instead.

We will talk about the most important principles in getting a girl to chase you in this section.

Use social proof

Show her you have other options.

Talk to other girls, and let her know you are desired by other attractive girls.

Jealousy is one of the strongest emotions you can arouse in girls.

In fact, many girls will sleep with you even if you are not their type when they see other attractive girls are into you.

Women have a strong urge to prove to other women that they are the most desirable one out of all.

Your value is going to increase in a girl’s eyes when she sees you with other attractive women.

You need to note, however, that this can easily backfire with girls who lack confidence.

If a girl doesn’t have a lot of confidence, she may already think you are out of her league.

And the fact you are talking to all of these attractive women may confirm her belief that she is not good enough for you.

Do not prioritize her

You do not want to make her the center of your universe.

Your attention shouldn’t be focused on her at all times.

Otherwise, she will know she’s completely won you over and quickly lose interest.

For example, let’s say you are talking to a girl for the first time, and your friend appears while you are talking to her, you want to greet your friend instead of ignoring him.

What does it communicate to her if you ignore your friend and put all of your focus on her?

You are practically announcing to her that you are desperate for female attention.

This doesn’t mean you should purposely ignore attractive girls.

You should still talk to them and be engaged while you are having a conversation.

But, it does mean you can’t put them on a pedestal.

Be polarizing by speaking what is on your mind

You need to start speaking what is on your mind when you are interacting with girls.

Most men filter what they say when they are talking to an attractive girl because they don’t want to offend her.

But, you need to realize a behavior like that is exactly what makes her put you into the same category as every other man, and lowers your value in her eyes.

So, don’t be afraid to express what you like or dislike.

Express yourself unapologetically rather than trying to act like someone that you think she would like.

You will notice girls chase you more when you do that.

Value yourself first

Don’t accommodate her schedule at all times.

For example, let’s say you are trying to set up a date.

What do most men do?

They try to accommodate to a girl’s schedule first and foremost.

Instead, tell her what days you are available, and you can ask about her schedule afterward.

It communicates to her that you actually have priorities in your life.

A woman does not want to be with a man whose life revolves around her.

When she can sense you actually have a purpose in your life, she will chase you more.

Status is the key to get her to chase

This one doesn’t apply to all situations, but it is singlehandedly the most effective way to get a girl to chase if demonstrated correctly.

How powerful is it to be a high-status person in an environment?

Just a simple act of you initiating a conversation with her can be enough to get her excited if she perceives you to have a higher status than her.

So, how can you position yourself as a higher status person when you talk to girls?

One way you can accomplish this is to talk to girls in an environment where you are the authority.

If you are in a position of teaching her something (yoga, dance, lifting, etc), or if you are the most respected person in the room, you will automatically be perceived as a high-status person in the environment.

You can also demonstrate your status through your behaviors.

Think about how most high-status men carry themselves, whether it be a president of the United States or an A-list celebrity.

They speak with conviction. They walk with purpose. They look at you with unwavering eye contact.

Throughout evolution, men have frequently lied to women about their status and the amount of resources they possess as a tactic to attract them.

As a result of this, women have become attuned to pick up subtle behavioral cues from men to assess whether he really is the real deal he says he is.

This is why it is crucial to pay attention to how you carry yourself before you even bother worrying about what to say to a girl.

Most women make judgments about you before you even open your mouth to say a word.

If you walk around like you haven’t stepped outside of your mom’s basement for years, she is going to shrug you off before you get a chance to talk to her.

So, do whatever it takes to elevate your status in a girl’s eyes, and sit back and watch her chase you.

Anyway, I hope this article gave you a clearer idea of why you shouldn’t chase a girl, and how you can make her chase instead.

But, it is on you to take the needed action to transform your dating life for the better.

Good luck!

About the Author Jon Go

I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.