Signs She’s Not Into You

How devastating is it to like a girl only to find out she is just not that into you as much as you are into her? So, is there a way to accurately tell if she is into you or not?

There is no one sign you can use to confirm that a girl is not into you. You can, however, be quite confident in knowing if a girl is into you or not when you observe more than a few of these signs. First, she gives you a nice little dog pat. Her body tends to faces away from you in a conversation. Maybe, she randomly mentions her boyfriend in a conversation. Or, she never initiates contact first. And we discuss much more in this article.

While you don’t want to over-think and use these signs as an excuse to not make a move, it is useful to know them to have a rough idea of where you stand with girls.

So, let’s go into more details on the signs you would normally observe from a woman that is not into you.

Dog Pat Means She Is Not Interested

Do you know one of those pats you give to your dog when he is being a good boy?

I am talking about that nice rough pat on your back.

This is usually a sign that indicates she is just not interested in you romantically.

It means she thinks of you as more of her friend or a little brother.

This is one of those things that people do not think much of it, but it has proven to be quite an effective sign at gauging a girl’s interest in my years of interacting with women.

Out of numerous interactions I’ve had with women over the years, I can only recall a handful of times where I received a dog pat from the girl, and I ended up “making love” to her.

What you want to see, instead, is for her hands to gently glide over your back, or for her to just softly rest her hand on your back when you guys hug.

But, do not assume it is a death sentence when the girl gives you a dog pat.

There is always an exception to the rule, and it is possible she may still be interested even if she gave you a dog pat.

When in doubt, use the last tip I discuss in this article to gauge her interest level, as it is one of the most reliable ways to find out if she is into you or not.

Body Facing Away

People lie with their words all the time, but very few can lie with their body.

We have been practicing to lie with our words growing up, but the same cannot be said for our body language.

It is true that a lot more people are aware of how to read other’s body language in this day and age (Thanks to the internet), but it is still rare for people to consciously control their body language to show or hide their intention.

And that is why it is a much better idea to focus on a woman’s body language over her words when you are trying to figure out if she is into you or not.

Our body tends to naturally face toward someone if we are intrigued by the person, or if we want the person to pay attention to us.

And for the same reason, our body tends to face away from someone we are not interested in, or if we want to disengage from the interaction.

The exception applies here as well.

If a girl tends to be extremely shy, then she may very well face away from you due to feeling nervous and awkward.

The more she (a shy woman) likes you, the more awkward she is going to feel around you because she doesn’t want to look stupid in front of a person she likes.

In such a case, she will most likely display a body language that appears to show disinterest despite her being interested in you.

And that is why it is important to always shoot your shot if you are unsure rather than micro-analyzing every little sign to figure out if she is into you or not.

She Lets You Know She Has A Boyfriend

Generally speaking, girls tend to shy away from letting you know they have a boyfriend if they are attracted to you.

If they like you and they enjoy talking to you, they would rather stay away from mentioning their relationship status.

Girls enjoy the validation they get from you, and they are afraid it may be taken away from them once they tell you they have a boyfriend.

So, if a girl goes out of her way to let you know she has a boyfriend, it may likely be a sign she is not into you.

There are plenty of times when I brought a girl back home from the bar or a club, and I only found out she has a boyfriend afterward.

When a girl says she has a boyfriend, I advise you to just move on instead of persisting.

Not only is this a sign of disinterest, but there is also no reason to try to get a girl with a boyfriend.

If you have a weird thing for going for a girl with a boyfriend, ask yourself this question.

Why are you trying to become a more attractive version of yourself?

Isn’t it so you can have more abundance in your dating life?

Clinging onto a girl with a boyfriend reeks of desperation, and it shows you have a very scarce mindset.

She Is Not Into You When She Barely Replies To Your Text

This is also a good sign she is not into you.

Generally speaking, if a girl is into you, then she is not going to delay texts more than a few hours.

It is possible she is playing games with you by replying to your texts a couple of hours after you send her a text.

But if the girl is into you, the fear of losing your interest will overpower whatever game she tries to play with you.

So, if she waits more than a day to reply, it would be safe for you to assume she is not interested.

Another sign of lack of interest is when she replies back with a very short text.

This usually indicates she has no interest in continuing a conversation with you.

When she doesn’t say much over text, you want to stay away from sending her a long text.

You do not want to reinforce her poor behavior by showing a lot of interest when she is not reciprocating.

So, it would be a better idea for you to reply with short texts as well.

She Never Initiates Contact First

If she never contacts you first, it means she is not into you as much as you are into her.

The only exception to this is if you leave no room for her to initiate contact first.

If you bombard her phone with text messages and calls every few hours, then she will have no reason to initiate contact with you first.

If that applies to you, you should stop being so needy and leave some room for her to participate.

Anyway, it is very difficult for a girl to not initiate contact with you if she likes you since it is only natural for her to be curious about what you are up to.

If she initiates contact with you only when she needs something, it is obviously a terrible sign.

Not only does this mean she is not into you, but it also likely means she is only using you for her own selfish needs.

She Does Not Want To Be Seen With You

When a woman likes you, she wants to introduce you to people around her.

She would want her friends to know, her family to know, and others to know that she is with you (If you guys are already seeing each other that is).

There are obviously exceptions to this rule, such as her being extremely jealous of you getting other girl’s (Her friends) attention, or having really strict parents who want her to only be with a certain type of a guy.

But generally speaking, she is going to want to introduce you to important people in her life.

If she does not want others to know that she is seeing you, then it can possibly mean she doesn’t take the relationship between the two of you very seriously.

Even worse, she may be embarrassed for others to find out that she is with you.

In such a case, it just means she is using you.

A Girl Is Not Into You If She Is Not Curious About You

If she is into you, she will be curious about you. She will want to know more about you.

It only makes sense for you to want to get to know more about someone that you like.

Think about the last time you were madly into a girl.

You probably had all sorts of questions in your mind.

What does she do? Where does she live? How old is she? What type of men does she like? Does she have a boyfriend? Is she into me?

Girls feel the same way when they are into you. They have all these questions that are lingering in their head.

One of the girls I used to go out with once told me that she took a couple of hours on one of the social media platforms to search for my profile when we first started talking to each other (Yes, girls can be just as creepy as men).

And that is what a lot of girls do when they are into a guy although they won’t admit it.

They spend a lot of time thinking about the guy, and what he is up to.

So, if a girl never asks you any personal questions, and she does not take any interest in knowing more about you, then that is often a clear sign she is not into you.

She Is Always Looking At Her Phone

This would have been an indisputable sign of disinterest even a decade ago, but it can be an ambiguous sign in this day and age, the reason being, everyone is on their phone all the time.

Nevertheless, if the girl is consistently on her phone the entire time you guys are hanging out, then that is a pretty clear sign she is not into you.

Women are not dumb. They understand it will leave a bad impression on a guy if they are routinely looking at their phone the whole time they are hanging out.

Even if she is addicted to checking her phone every two seconds, she will put her best effort into avoiding that if she is into you.

So, if she checks her phone all the time, it likely means she just does not find you interesting, and she is looking for an excuse to ignore you.

She can also be doing this to indirectly let you know she is not into you.

Either way, it is an extremely disrespectful behavior to display when hanging out with another person (especially when you are getting to know each other), and you should not tolerate such behavior from a woman.

She Is Always Busy

How many times have you asked a girl out, and she told you she is really busy with her life, but she will let you know once she has more free time?

In most cases, that is her polite way of saying, “I’m just not that into you enough to make any time for you”.

If you are really attracted to someone, then you will make time for that person.

Even some of the busiest and the most successful people in the world have time to go on a date and fall in love.

So, when a girl says she is too busy, just move on from her and find a girl who will love and respect you.

Trust me. She is out there.

She Maintains Distance

If she backs off when you are standing close to her, then it may mean she is not into you.

We usually want to stand close to someone we like.

On the other hand, we tend to maintain distance with someone that repels us.

If she has a shy personality, then it is possible she needs a little more time to feel comfortable enough around you to stand close to you even if she likes you.

But generally speaking, it is safe to assume she has at least some interest in you if she doesn’t mind standing very close to you.

Playing around with distance is also a great way to gauge a girl’s interest level when you are out at a bar or the club.

When you approach a girl at a bar or the club, you can step forward (in a subtle way) to reduce the distance while you talk to her.

If she is comfortable with you being right up in her face, then that is a positive sign she is attracted to you.

She Does Not Want To Follow Your Lead

If you are still unsure whether she is into you or not after looking for all the signs, then this is by far one of the most accurate ways to gauge her interest level.

When in doubt, lead her.

If she follows your lead, then that is a very clear sign she is into you.

Most girls don’t normally follow the lead of a man she does not like, trust, and respect.

And when I tell you to lead a girl, it does not have to be anything complicated.

For example, if you meet a woman at a bar, it can be as simple as asking her to come outside to get some fresh air with you.

Leading a girl is often the most convenient way to find out her interest level.

You can be sitting there analyzing every little sign of interest and disinterest, or you can simply lead her and see if she follows your lead.

The latter will reduce so much of your headache and make your life easier.

Anyway, look out for these signs to figure out if a girl is into you, but simply lead her when in doubt!

About the Author Jon Go

I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.