Put Her In Her Place

So should you destroy her ego to put her in her place?

I recently came across a video where the dating coach was talking about destroying a girl’s ego because the girl needs to be routinely put in her place to keep her ego check.

I figured I would give my two cents on it since some of the points he made in the video are widely accepted by a lot of guys in this dating community.

Here is the first point he made.

He suggests you text your girl and tell her that you are going to dump her.

His reason is that most girl’s ego is through the roof since they are always the one rejecting guys and dumping their boyfriend from having so many options.

And apparently, telling her you are going to break up with her is a great way to put a girl in her place.

Here is what I think.

Put girls in their place because their egos are through the roof?

I think it’s a common misconception that most girl’s egos are through the roof.

You need to realize that girls only act like an egotistical bitch in front of guys that they perceive to have no value in their life.

Do you think they would act all bitchy and egotistical to their male boss… to their crush… to their personal trainer?


She only acts that way in front of you because she subconsciously made up in her mind that you are just another low-value man who brings no value to her life.

So, you can either send her, “I’m going to break up with you” although you don’t even mean it, or actually increase your value and become the man she can’t resist.

The second point that was emphasized in the video is to have sex with a girl and not text her afterward.

His reasoning is that when you have sex with her, you essentially take her soul and everything she’s got, because a girl having sex with you apparently means she’s given you everything.

And he said when you do this, it will make her feel insecure because a woman entire self-worth is defined by her private part.

In my humble opinion, that is some 18th century BS.

Based on my personal experience, girls do not really put as much importance on sex (on whether she is going to continue to see the guy or not) as many men would like to believe.

I’ve been going out and interacting with women for years, and I’ve had my fair share of experiences.

I’ve seen enough girls who were down to have threesomes with two guys, and many girls who were willing to have sex with four or five guys (at the same time) for me to believe that girls would automatically become attached to you as soon as they have sex with you.

Did these girls give their soul to each and every man  who participated in a group sex with her? I doubt it.

There are certainly girls who are more picky with who they choose to have sex with, but there are enough girls who just want to have sex for the sake of having sex.

You are not going to make every girl start chasing you for your validation by not sending her a text after you have sex with her  (especially the ones that fall into the latter category).

Let’s move onto the third point.

Put your girl in her place by delaying your text?

The third point he made is to wait for hours until you text her back.

I’m sure you know what I’m going to say at this point. It is a rather stupid point as well.

Think about what it implies when you see a girl’s text and you ‘intentionally’ delay your text.

I picture an image of a man who saw the girl’s text, and he is sitting there and counting the minutes until the time is finally up for him to send a girl text.

Picture a man who’s calculating all these little moves, and using his little tricks to play his little games with girls.

Do you really want to be that little piece of shit?

Don’t you just want to be a cool attractive dude who enjoys doing his own shit and naturally attracts girls?

I don’t know about you but I certainly do.

If you agree with me on that, then here’s my suggestion.

Why not just make it a rule to check your phone only on specific times throughout the day.

For example, you can check your phone once at eight in the morning and one last time at eight in the evening.

If the girl happens to text you at 7:59 pm, then you answer her at 8:00 pm.

If the girl happens to text you at 8:01 am, then you still answer her at 8:00 pm.

You are in your own rhythm and not at the effect of others.

Here is the fourth point he made in the video.

Call a girl fat to kill her ego?

I wasn’t even sure if I should respond to this because it is just pathetic.

Blatantly insulting a girl’s physiques to make her feel insecure is not what a real man would do.

And I’ll be honest with you.

I’ve certainly said some embarassing things to women in the past, so I’m not going to sit here and pretend I’m so much more morally superior to others.

But, I’ve learned that being cruel to others do not give you any sense of joy or fulfillment.

The more you fill your brain up with negative thoughts to bring others down, the more you will become miserable and rotten inside.

Finally, the last and fifth point he made is to tell the girl that her friend is kind of cute.

This is to bring her ego down, and make her feel insecure about herself.

I want you to realize that every one of his suggestions comes from the perspective of a low-value man.

If you are a high value person, the girl will understand you are a man with a lot of options, and she will naturally want to hang onto you as long as she can.

There is no reason for you to bring her value down, so she chases you more.

So, why wouldn’t you put your effort into becoming a high value man as opposed to focusing your effort in bringing a girl’s value down to your level?

There are two types of people.

People who drag other people down to their level, so they feel good about their miserable life.

And people who put in the work and bring themselves up, and inspire others to get on their level.

It’s up to you to decide how you want to live your life.

We all like to point fingers at others, and blame others for why we couldn’t do this or that.

It is just much easier to tear other people apart and bring them down than having to put in the work to elevate yourself.

But how the heck is that going to improve your life?

It simply won’t.

You need to take responsibility for your life.

And this applies whether you are a man or a woman reading this.

For example, one of my ex-girlfriends used to talk about how her friend got sexually harassed when she was out late at night, and she was completely (and voluntarily) intoxicated.

I would tell her that there’s no doubt the guy is a piece of shit, but maybe her friend should’ve exercised some personal responsibility as well.

When I said that to her, she would often flip out saying things, such as…

“Omg, you are victim blaming…”… “That is BS!”

But, here’s the truth.

Whether she liked to admit it or not, there will always be scumbags who will try to take advantage of drunk girls.

So, when you know that, it makes sense for women to do their best to not put themselves in that type of vulnerable situation.

Anyway, I don’t hate on girls. I don’t hate on guys.

I just lack patience for people who refuse to take any sort of personal responsibility.

I used to be like that, and I absolutely hated myself.

Most people don’t want to hear this because working on yourself actually takes time and effort.

Going back to the advice given by the dating coach, it is not a good strategy to follow his advice even from a purely tactical point of view. 

Because everything that he suggests you do, the girl can easily flip it on you and do exactly the same.

She can easily delay her texts.

She can easily say your friend is so much more attractive.

She can easily say you are ugly.

But, what is hard to fake is your actual value.

A girl will want to hang onto you when you become so valuable to her to the point she has a hard time picturing any man that’s better than you.

And when I say value, I am not necessarily talking about looks or money.

Your ability to arouse strong emotion in her and giving her a wide range of emotion can also be an immense value to her.

If you take one thing away from this article, I just want you to realize the importance of becoming a man who is focused on bettering himself rather than bringing others down.

I wish you the best of luck!

About the Author Jon Go

I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.