How scary is it to ask a girl out in person?
She may reject you in front of others, or she may laugh at your face for thinking you had any chance with her in the first place.
So, why not just ask a girl out over text, so you don’t face all those potential humiliations?
If you get rejected, you can just cry in the corner of your room for a few hours and cry yourself to sleep (Just kidding, don’t do that…), and no one else has to see you being all pathetic after getting rejected by a girl.
Well, there is actually a very good reason why you probably want to consider asking her out in person as opposed to over text.
Why it is not ok to ask a girl out over text
So, let’s talk about why it is superior to ask a girl out in person as long as you have enough emotional resilience to withstand a potential rejection.
To understand this, it would be useful to talk about why companies prefer to see clients in person when they are trying to sell higher-priced products.
It is because they understand it is a lot easier to influence a person’s decision when the person is sitting right in front of them.
And it really is no different when you are asking a girl to do something.
She will have a harder time rejecting you if you are sitting there in front of her face.
I can already hear someone say, “But, aren’t you essentially pressuring a girl who does not really want to go out with you to saying yes in that case?”
But, here is the truth…
Turn maybe girl into a yes girl by asking her out in person
A lot of girls you will meet in your life are going to be “maybe” girls.
You may not exactly fit her type, but she is still somewhat willing to go out with you because she may feel lonely or she is just bored.
Some men might say, “I only want girls who are completely into me!” and I can respect that.
In fact, that is how I feel now that I have enough abundance in my dating life.
But, if you are still a beginner in the dating world, it is not a bad idea for you to accumulate as much experience as you possibly can until you become competent at meeting women.
And you are going to create much more opportunities to hang out with women by asking her out in person, rather than over text.
So anyway, it is a lot more convenient for a girl to say no when you ask her out over text, even if she may be somewhat interested in you.
On the other hand, it is rather inconvenient to reject somewhat in person.
Nobody likes saying no to another person’s face in real life. It makes us feel like a terrible person, and most of us do not like to deliberately hurt another person’s feeling.
Commitment and consistency bias
On top of that, when she says yes to you asking her out in person, a “commitment and consistency bias” kicks in for her.
This is an inherent bias in the human brain that guides the person to be consistent with his prior commitments, words, and actions even if it is not within his best interest.
So, a girl will likely feel somewhat responsible to spend time with you when she says yes to your request to hang out.
And there is nothing wrong with that. Some girls may start out not liking you very much, but she can easily become the most loving girl as she gets to know you better.
A girl does not necessarily have to start out loving you with all of her heart from the get-go.
In fact, you probably want to stay away from a girl who falls in love with you so easily, since there is a good chance she is the type who constantly needs attention from men.
A weird reason why you want to ask a girl out in person
Here is a rather weird reason why I believe you would benefit from asking a girl out in person.
I strongly believe facing rejections will help you grow more than most things you will experience in life.
There is just something about experiencing rejection in person that is going to light a fire under you (as long as you don’t let it destroy you).
And it will most likely motivate you to transform your dating life for the better.
I personally made a decision to embrace rejections when I started going out to meet girls.
I internalized that the more rejections I experience, the faster I would grow.
This mindset allowed me to take massive action because I viewed rejections as a positive experience for my growth, and I no longer feared rejections.
With the correct mindset, I was able to completely transform my dating life from being a 26-year-old virgin to meeting new, attractive girls on a weekly basis.
This is one of the main reasons why I want you to overcome your fear and ask a girl out in person, and stay away from asking her out over text.
Do this instead of asking a girl out over text
Although I encourage you to ask a girl out in person, I also realize some men are just not in the right headspace to do that at this moment.
If that applies to you, here is what I suggest you do instead of asking her out over text.
I want you to pick up your phone and call her.
Picking up your phone and calling her is the second-best thing you can do apart from asking her out in person.
So, why is that?
Use your voice to convey emotion
It is because you can actually use your voice to convey emotion.
There is only so much you can communicate with written words alone.
It is much more difficult to express the feeling of passion, love, excitement, enthusiasm, sexual desire, etc when there is no sound attached to the words.
One of the fundamental principles of persuasion is to feel whatever emotion you want the other person to feel.
So, if you want a girl to feel excited, then you want to be excited first.
If you want a girl to feel sexual, then you want to feel sexual first.
When you are talking to a girl on the phone, it is much easier to transfer your emotion through your voice.
And the first step to influencing a girl is to change her emotion before you ask her to do anything.
If you ask a girl out after you get her excited to see you, she is much more likely to say yes than if you were to ask her out over text.
Save time by asking her out over the phone
You also save a lot of time by asking a girl out over the phone.
Think about how much time you waste texting a girl and waiting for her reply.
Even worse, you are most likely wasting your time constantly checking your phone and thinking about what to text her.
If you factor all of that into consideration, you probably easily waste hours of your life by relying on texting as your primary mode of communication.
When you pick up your phone and call her, you can get everything done within a matter of 5 minutes.
On top of that, you are able to dictate the flow of the conversation without seeming desperate (i.e. when you ask a girl to hang out over text and she doesn’t reply, then any text you send her after is going to make you seem desperate).
This allows you to stay on topic (hanging out in real life) instead of wasting your time talking about other BS you probably could care less about.
Do this if you really want to ask a girl out over text
You may feel like you are incapable of neither asking her out in person nor over the phone.
And to be honest, I would advise you to seek professional help if your anxiety is that extreme.
But, I will give a very brief tip on how you should go about this if you are really determined to rely on texting only to ask a girl out.
You basically want to be as low-key as you possibly can, and you also want to make it as easy as you possibly can for a girl to say yes.
When you ask a girl out by implying that you want to take her out on a date, it is most likely going to be a lot of pressure on her.
Once again, it is much easier for a girl to reject you over text, and she won’t hesitate to do that if she feels too much pressure by your request.
So, when you ask a girl out over text, you want to make it sound like you are inviting her for a social event, rather than making it sound like you are asking her out on a date (assuming she is not that into you yet).
You can invite her to your friend’s party, or ask her if she wants to join you and your friends for dinner.
Even asking her if she wants to grab coffee for half an hour or so would be a lot less pressure than asking her out for dinner.
So, do your best to make it easy for her to say yes if you are determined to ask a girl out over text!