Is it ever a good idea to tell a woman how you feel toward her, or is this a mistake that should be avoided at all cost?
After having talked to thousands of girls in the past few years, I’m quite confident I’ve figured out the answers for this question.
Let’s get started if you are ready to hear the truth.
Stay away from directly complimenting a woman
So, why is it a good idea to stay away from complimenting a woman?
The first reason is so you do not get lumped with other desperate men who primarily rely on complimenting a woman to show their intentions.
A lot of men are quick to compliment women they find attractive because they put them on a pedestal.
And you certainly do not want women to think you are just another lame man who tries to suck up to her.
You are giving away a lot of power by starting off your interaction with a woman by complimenting her.
Don’t get me wrong. There is no doubt she is going to appreciate your compliments.
But, does that mean her attraction for you is going to increase as a result?
The answer is a clear no in most cases.
So, why are you giving away your power when you compliment a girl (before you know anything about her)?
In such a case, you are communicating to a woman you are into her before she even shows any signs of interest in you.
You automatically position yourself as a ‘chaser’.
When you start off your interaction by chasing her, it is going to be difficult for you to flip it around as your relationship with a woman progresses further.
This is obviously not ideal if you want to have a relationship that does not make you constantly feel like crap.
A relationship where you do not at least have an equal amount of power as your woman will only lower your sense of self-worth, and the relationship won’t be sustainable.
So, setting the right frame from the get-go can really help you avoid these mistakes.
When it is okay to compliment
So, is it ever okay to compliment a girl, or should you avoid compliments at all costs?
There is actually one circumstance where it doesn’t hurt to tell a woman that you like her.
When your perceived value is higher than the girl, your compliments can serve as reassurance to her that she is good enough for you.
If a woman already thinks you are too good for her, and you make fun of her by teasing her, she may very well feel like she doesn’t deserve you.
In such scenario, it is not exactly a terrible idea to give her some compliments.
The same exact idea applies when you are talking to a woman who is very insecure.
For a woman with a lot of insecurities, even a little bit of playful teasing can hurt her feelings, and make her despise you.
So, if a woman is insecure, it is often better to put more focus on making her feel comfortable by complimenting her, and spending more time with her.
It is not difficult to gauge what type of communication she prefers within the first few minutes of talking to her.
If her eyes light up and her face becomes brighter when you compliment her, then it is obviously a good idea to compliment her more frequently.
On the other hand, if she is more responsive to your teases, you would want to tease her more.
That being said, you never want to rely on one style of communication.
When you stick to one style of communication, she will quickly become de-sensitized to what you say, and your words will quickly lose its effectiveness.
So, it is important to strike a right balance between compliments and teases (aka push and pull).
Why revealing your feeling can actually backfire
One of the biggest problems with revealing your feelings is that it may kill curiosity about you.
Curiosity plays such an important role during the initial part of the attraction.
When you become an open book to a woman, her interest will quickly dissipate away.
Women want to win a man over.
As much as what Hollywood movie may like you to believe, women do not want to be with a desperate man who incessantly chase them.
They want a man who has a lot of options in his dating life, but chose them from the many options he had available.
Think about what it communicates to a woman if you resort to flattery when you barely know her?
This will let her know she is a ‘catch’ for you, and she will act accordingly.
Not only will this make it difficult for you to attract her, but it will likely be a one-sided relationship even if you somehow manage to convince her to go out with you.
I do need to note, however, that articulating your thoughts and feelings well can be incredibly beneficial when you are in a serious relationship with a woman.
This ability comes in especially handy when you are discussing about serious matter with your woman.
If you leave it to a woman to guess your thoughts and feelings, she will usually assume the worst.
So, it is important you learn how to clearly articulate your thoughts and feelings.
If you are constantly playing games with a woman (even when you are in a relationship), she is eventually going to get tired of you.
This is precisely why you need to work on your overall communication skill if you want to become truly good with women.
If the way you communicate with a woman is based only on gimmicks, such as negs, push and pull, and teasing, then it won’t be too long before she sees that you have no substance in your personality.
Should you tell a woman how you feel over text?
As we have discussed already, telling a woman how you feel is already as bad as it is even in person (for the most part).
So, it is generally a terrible idea to tell a woman how you feel over text.
You only communicate with your words when you text a girl.
You can’t use your vocal tonality, facial expression, or your body language to express yourself fully.
For this reason, it is unlikely your words are going to hit her hard when they are communicated to her over text.
I advise you to strictly use text messaging for setting up a date.
Whatever you want to communicate to a woman, save it for when you see her in person if you want it to have a more powerful impact.
More often than not, your attempt to flatter her will only appear pathetic in her eyes when it’s done over text.
When a woman does not show any signs of interest…
This is the worst time to profess your love to a woman.
You are automatically going to appear needy if you show high levels of interest when a girl shows zero signs of interest in you.
Do not make a mistake of over-investing in a woman who does put in any effort to get to know you more.
The more you chase a woman who does not want to be chased, the more she will become repelled by you.
So, what is the best way to attract a woman who shows no signs of interest?
My first recommendation is to not waste your time on a woman who is not into you, but if you are absolutely determined to impress her, here is my advice to you.
First and foremost, you need to increase your value in her eyes.
Why do you think women are not attracted to you in the first place?
It is because you don’t have enough perceived value, whether it be in the form of physical attractiveness, a great lifestyle, or status.
So, the real solution (which is not easy by any means) is to elevate your value in all of those areas.
This means working on your fitness, your career, and your personality.
Not only will you attract more women when you transform into a higher value man, but you will no longer have to constantly cater to a woman’s unreasonable behavior because you are afraid of losing her.
When you have an abundance of options, you don’t have to settle for less, and your dating life will become that much better.
I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.
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