How To Talk To A Girl For The First Time

The first time is always the most nerve-wracking moment for anyone.

So, what is the best way to leave a good first impression when talking to a girl for the first time?

That is what you are going to find out in this article.

How to talk to a girl for the first time on the phone 

This general principle we are about to discuss applies to all types of ‘first-time’ situations.

Whenever you talk to a girl for the first time, it is often best to avoid getting into a serious conversation too soon.

The female attraction doesn’t happen as a girl ‘logically’ understanding that you are the right man for her.

If that were the case, you would simply send her a resume with your pictures which goes into details about what you do and how you are as a person.

A girl needs to feel something when she is with you in order for her to become attracted to you.

The problem with having a serious conversation with a girl is that you are most likely going to bore her to death.

So you may be wondering, what is the best type of emotion to arouse in a girl when you talk to her for the first time?

While there are different types of emotions that can lead to attraction, it is always a safe bet to focus on having the most fun in your interaction with women.

But, how does this apply to a phone conversation? It’s rather simple.

You don’t necessarily have to come up with tens of witty jokes that will blow her world.

What’s important, however, is to pay attention to the way you talk.

Your tonality has the biggest influence on how a girl perceives you.

If you sound all depressed and low energy (by the way, there is a difference between low energy and having a chill vibe), then you will turn a girl off.

On the other hand, if your tone is positive and playful (without being clownish), then she is going to become more drawn to you.

Since a girl can’t see your facial expression or your body language over the phone, it is crucial your tonality is dialed in.

This means your chance with a girl can be greatly elevated (or decreased) depending on how you sound when talking to a girl.

For this reason, if you know how to use your tonality to influence a girl’s emotion, it is a great idea to call her.

How to talk to a girl for the first time face to face 

You have a lot more tools at disposal when talking to a girl in person.

You can use your facial expression and body language on top of your voice and words.

If you know how to use all of these tools effectively, your chance of attracting a girl will increase exponentially.

If, on the other hand, you have no clue how to present yourself in an attractive manner using these tools, your chance will be greatly hampered.

So, let’s get into details about how best to present yourself when talking to a girl for the first time in person.

Eye contact

You need to be able to maintain solid eye contact with a girl.

Girls look into your eyes to figure out if you are a confident man.

If you flinch or look away when she makes eye contact, she is going to assume you are not very confident, and her attraction will dissipate away.

Body language

Needless to say, you want to stand straight up when talking to a girl, but that alone is not enough.

You also need to make sure you are fully relaxed when talking to a girl, and this is arguably more important than assuming a good, straight posture.

Even if you have the most perfect posture, you will still look terrible if you look tight and stiff.

But, when you look comfortable in your own skin despite not having the most perfect posture, you will still look fine for the most part.

So, focus on feeling relaxed in your body first before you care about good postures.

As a side note, I want to point out one of the most common mistakes that many men make when talking to attractive girls in a loud environment.

A lot of men tend to excessively lean forward (especially at the club or a bar environment) when they have a conversation with a woman.

This is a terrible habit because such behavior indicates you are desperate for a woman’s approval.

So, hold your ground and stand in your spot. If it is difficult to talk because of loud music, then simply bring her into you instead of excessively moving into her space.

This will make you appear a lot more confident than the other way around.

Vocal tonality

There is a lot of different advice when it comes to speaking with an attractive tone.

Some people say you should try to talk with a deep voice to attract girls.

Some people believe you need to vary your tones to be more expressive.

These are all correct.

However, you also risk appearing try-hard.

If there is one thing you can do to make a girl quickly lose interest in you, it is showing any signs of try-hardness.

So, here is what I suggest you do instead.

I want you to talk to girls as if you were talking to your best friend.

You wouldn’t talk with a fake friendly tone when you talk to your best friend, would you?

This will help you to act more chill and normal in front of attractive women.

Most men talk with too much excitement and enthusiasm when they talk to hot girls.

It is good to be positive and playful when you talk to girls, but it is not exactly a great idea to be filled with too much excitement.

When you act in an unnatural manner, it indirectly communicates to a girl that you are not used to being around hot girls.

It is much better if a girl thinks you are a man who is used to being around hot girls all of the time because girls want men who are desired by other females.

This is not difficult to understand considering it is in our (both men and women) nature to want something that others want as well.

How to talk to a girl for the first time over text

Let’s talk about the most important principle to keep in mind when talking to a woman for the first time over text.

It is important to keep things simple.

Stay away from trying to be overly witty or humorous.

It once again goes back to eliminating the try-hardness in all of your behaviors.

The more you ‘try’ to leave a good impression, the less likely she is going to be impressed by your effort.

Simply texting a girl, “Hey, it was nice talking to you” will often suffice.

That being said, it is not a bad idea to make a playful remark about something funny that happened during your interaction (e.g. some drunk guy nearly throwing up on you, or how your friend was acting stupid at the party) but don’t go overboard with it.

What to say when meeting a girl for the first time

Is there a magic line you can say to capture a girl’s heart when you meet her for the first time?

The short answer is no.

In fact, it is a terrible idea to prepare lines in advance because human interactions are filled with uncertainties.

More often than not, your pre-rehearsed lines will only come off as robotic and mechanical.

Rather, it is much better to have a few key principles in your mind when you are interacting with women.

These are some of the most important key principles I want you to keep in mind if you want to successfully leave a good impression with a girl you meet for the first time.

1. Focus on keeping your interaction playful especially when you talk to a girl for the first time.

2. Spend more time listening to her and relating to her instead of talking non-stop about yourself.

3. Stay away from overly complimenting a girl unless you actually mean it.

4. Be engaged but not overly enthusiastic (Being overly enthusiastic lets a girl know you are sold on her).

The right ‘lines’ will come out when you ingrain these principles into your brain.

I wish you the best of luck!

About the Author Jon Go

I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.

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