How To Start A Text Conversation With A Girl

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In this article, I want to help dispel all the myths when it comes to starting a text conversation with a girl.

But before I tell you the best way to initiate a text, I want you to take note of how you should NOT be texting a girl.

Without further ado, let’s get right into it.

Do NOT send her a long text

Just stay away from sending one of those long-ass paragraphs especially when you barely know the girl.

This does not just apply for when you are initiating a text conversation but should be kept in mind throughout your text (although there are exceptions for when a long text can be beneficial but I would not recommend for 99% of guys).

There are a couple of problems with sending long texts.

1. Guys who send long texts to girls tend to be needy and creepy and most girls have had bad experiences with them. So even if you are not one of those guys, you will automatically be categorized into one of them.

2. It shows you care way too much about her off the bat. It communicates you have no option and you are desperate.

Do NOT text her cheesy compliments

I made this mistake of being way too “flashy” with my texts when I first started getting girl’s numbers.

It comes off as cheesy and way too try-hard.

So what do I mean by being flashy with text…

Basically any and everything that would make you cringe if you were to say it in real life.

For example…

“You were astoundingly beautiful last night when I saw you. I really hope to see you again honey”.

It made me cringe even typing that out but I’m sure there are a lot worse examples than that.

When you tell her how you were so awestruck by her beauty, you may very well mean it when you say it.

But think about how the girl would feel when she sees the text.

She would be overwhelmed with the pressure and get weirded out.

The likelihood of her being impressed by texts like that from someone she barely knows is very slim.

Do NOT triple text her

This is common sense.

You should not send her multiple texts in a row within a day or even a few days.

When you don’t know the girl, there really is no reason for you to be bombarding her with multiple texts in a row when she is not replying back.

Your neediness and clinginess will repel most hot girls away and completely destroy any chance you may have had with her.

It is just going to solidify in her mind it was the right decision to not answer you back.

I know there are going to be guys who try to refute this by saying how they were able to get girls to respond by triple or quadruple texting.

And guess what?

I have done that many times as well…

But that still does not make it the highest probability move.

Texting a girl a few days later when she hasn’t replied to your first text can be a good tactical move depending on how you pull it off.

But it’s never a good idea to send multiple texts in a row within a day or even a few days.

What you do want to text her

With that being said, let’s now talk about some of the things you definitely want to consider when initiating a text conversation with a girl.

But before we proceed, let me ask you one question.

Who do you think are the masters of persuasion with written words?

I am not sure if you are at all familiar with copywriters…

These are people who make millions and millions of dollars with their pen.

Most copywriters used to work for crafting advertisements in newspapers and magazines in the old days.

Now, their role has shifted more toward writing online sales page as consumer’s attention started shifting more toward online.

So why the heck are we talking about copywriters in an article where we are discussing how to initiate a text conversation with a girl?

Well… it is because the fundamental of human psychology does not change whether it comes to selling to strangers or trying to make your crush respond to your text.

There are a lot of different psychological triggers that copywriters employ to get people to respond depending on different stages.

But THIS is the most important psychological trigger if you want people responding to your texts.

And that is…


It is just an insanely powerful trigger that I’ve emphasized over and over again in my previous articles.

Once you master this principle, you will be able to make girls reply almost on demand.

You need to realize when the girl doesn’t know you well enough, it’s unlikely you are going to be able to create strong enough connection and attraction to the point she will anxiously be waiting for your text.

In such a case, your best bet is to arouse her curiosity to the point she can’t help but ask what it is that you want to tell her.

But there is one more important thing you want to keep in mind for this to work.

You want to get her curious about something that is relevant to her over anything else.

What do you think everyone’s favorite topic is…?

It is a topic about themselves.

It is unlikely she has enough interest in you to the point that she is desperate to find out what you do for work or how many puppies you have.

Let me give you an example to crystallize the point in your head.

1. Curiosity about YOU (Not ideal as a way to initiate a text) – “I’m not sure if I should tell you what I do for work…”

2. Curiosity about HER – “I’m not sure if you would want to hear this but that night when we met, I noticed that you…”

Out of the two, you want your text to be more like the second example when she’s not that emotionally invested in you.

I do need to emphasize this, however.

If the girl was sufficiently into you during the interaction, there is not much reason for you to over-complicate the text.

Something as simple as, “Hey” will often suffice for her to respond to you.

Generally speaking, spiking her curiosity is only necessary for scenarios where you feel like you did not have a solid interaction with the girl.

One last point I want to talk about is that it is usually a good idea to get her on the phone if possible.

It is often hard to fully convey what you mean over written words.

I am sure you’ve heard it’s not about “what” you say but “how” you say it.

That “how” part is completely lost over written words.

On the other hand, you are able to much better convey your personality when she can hear your voice.

I’ve gone into great detail on how you can get a girl to pick up her phone in some of my other articles but here is the gist of it.

When she answers your text, call her right away.

She knows you know she has her phone in front of her and it is awkward for her to not answer your call.

When she picks up her phone, it is then just a matter of you vibing with her and amplifying her desire to want to meet you.

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