We naturally fear the unknown, so it only makes sense for you to feel uncomfortable when you feel like you don’t really understand women on a deep level.
If you didn’t interact with a lot of women growing up, you will often wrongly believe that women are cut from a different cloth.
It is no wonder that you feel shy and awkward around girls if you feel like you have no clue what is going on inside their heads.
Shy men’s misconception about women
In this section, I want to list some of the most common misconceptions that a lot of inexperienced men have about girls.
1. Women don’t like sex as much as men
Women enjoy sex as much as men when they are with a man who knows how to turn them on.
Women like to be desired by a man who is strong and masculine.
If you happen to be a man who knows what you are doing, she is going to love getting physically intimate with you.
2. You need to have money to attract women
This is surprisingly a common belief.
You may believe you need to get your financial situation sorted out before you have the ‘right’ to attract a beautiful girl.
It is true that being financially independent and having a lot of money can help you keep girls.
Money provides more comfort in your life.
With enough money, you are able to give better experiences for a woman by taking her out to nicer places. Everything also becomes a lot more convenient when you have money (driving to a restaurant in Bentley is a lot better experience than having to take public transit for an hour to get to a restaurant).
You are not going to beat your shyness by sitting in your room and meditating without actually talking to girls (although meditation can be a VERY powerful supplement to beat your anxiety as we will discuss later).
For you to get better at talking to girls, you actually need to go out and talk to girls.
I’m not going to advise you to start roaming around the street for five hours a day approaching women like some of the pick-up artists would recommend you do (I’ve been there and done that, and it is not worth the effort).
But, you will get used to it over time, and you will be surprised at how much progress you’ve made when you look back after even a few months of doing this.
Whenever you feel resistance kicking in, ask yourself how you would feel when you are eighty years old, and you look back on your life and realize how many opportunities you have missed due to your illogical fears.
Are you willing to constantly put yourself in uncomfortable situations for some period of time if it means you will attain lifelong social freedom?
The answer was a clear yes for me, and that was more than enough motivation for me to keep pushing through difficult times.
I contemplated about discussing the benefits of physical exercises for improving shyness, but I decided to just stick to talking about meditation.
This is primarily because I truly believe in the benefits of meditation.
From my personal experience, I’ve found that working on your mental health is far superior to working on your physical health when it comes to beating your anxiety around girls.
And meditation is about the best habit you can adopt to improve your mental health.
A consistent practice of meditation for around one year helped me reduce my overall anxiety much more than going to the gym for ten years.
Not only am I preaching meditation based on my personal experience alone, but a lot of studies are clearly starting to demonstrate the benefits of meditation as well.
So, I urge you to give meditation a try for at least a month (although I figure you will start to notice life-changing benefits within a few weeks or even a few days).
In the worst-case scenario, it would have served as a good practice for self-control (since you have to sit in one spot for more than 20 minutes without budging).
In the best-case scenario, your life will completely transform for the better.
If you don’t know where to start, I recommend you to start with meditating for just 20 minutes a day.
Sit on your chair, close your eyes, focus on your breathing, and don’t move for 20 minutes.
When you first start meditating, your brain will start to come up with all kind of reasons as to why you should get up and do something.
It will tell you to get up and do the dishes, reply to that email you haven’t replied in the past few days, or go to the washroom and floss your teeth.
But, you simply need to let your thoughts pass.
Meditation essentially trains you to be in charge of your own mind instead of letting your mind control your behaviors.
And the more you are in charge of your mind and your behaviors, the more your inner confidence will grow.
When your confidence grows, you start to carry yourself differently, and you will become a lot less hesitant in the way you express yourself when you interact with other people.
I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.
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