Why even bother making a girl think about you? Well, it is sort of difficult to develop a connection with someone that we rarely think about. Getting her to think about you is pretty much a pre-requisite if you want her to fall in love with you. So, what exactly are the best ways to make a girl think about you?
These are some of the most proven ways to make a girl think about you. First, you want to be memorable. If you have an easily forgettable personality and looks, then she is not going to think about you. Second, you want to base the topic of the conversation around her. Girls love talking about themselves. Third, learn how to be a little mysterious. Fourth, arouse strong emotion in her. Finally, create a vacuum.
I just hope you take the tips from this article as a way to enhance your interaction with girls rather than using them to manipulate girls.
Some of these tips can easily be misused to make a girl suffer tremendously, so I urge you to only use it for a good cause.
With that being said, let’s dive right in.
Be Memorable To Make Her Want You
The first and foremost way to make a girl think about you is to actually be someone who is worth thinking about.
If there is nothing interesting about you, then it is tough to expect a girl to think about you.
So, you want to become someone who is memorable.
And how do you accomplish that?
Well, you can accomplish this either with your personality or looks.
Let’s first talk about how you can stand out with your looks.
But, I need to clarify you don’t want to stand out for the sake of standing out.
For example, if you are naked in front of a girl in public, you would most certainly stand out but for the wrong reason.
You would stand out in a way that makes a girl perceive you as a clown, and she would not want to be associated with you.
But, you want to have some positive qualities about you that differentiate you from most average men.
This can be having a lot of muscle mass.
This can be having a unique fashion style.
This can be the way you look at a girl in the eyes or the facial expressions you make.
Instead of trying to develop something you do not possess, think about what you already have.
Do you have a lot of muscle mass? Then, wear something that shows off your muscle without appearing try-hard.
Do you have a tall, model-like build that would look good in most clothes? Then, work on optimizing your fashion.
Most men are terrible at taking care of their physical appearances.
If you are able to take care of yourself even a slight bit, then you will be so much further ahead of the masses.
Let’s now talk about how you can stand out with your personality.
Do you understand how rare it is for an attractive girl to come across a man who is real and authentic while being fun and carefree at the same time?
Most men either try to put on a fake “bad boy” persona which comes off as weird and try-hard, or they pretend to be a nice guy with the sole intention of getting into her pants.
It is incredibly difficult for an attractive woman to meet a dude who is just completely himself, without being fake or trying to impress her.
No. You don’t need to become this man who possesses the humor of Kevin Hart, the charisma of Robert De Niro, and the charm of Leonardo Dicaprio.
If you can just be relaxed and yourself around her, then that will often suffice.
That will be enough for you to leave that lasting impression on her, and make her think about you even after you are gone.
So, what does it even mean to be yourself around girls?
Here is a good way to assess whether you are putting on a fake mask in front of girls.
Do you talk to them like you would talk to your best friends?
If she were your girlfriend, would you still treat her the way you do right now?
If you said no to any of these questions, then you know you are not being your real self.
You most likely feel reluctant to speak your mind in front of attractive girls because you fear to lose her validation.
You probably become extra careful around girls you find attractive because you don’t want to mess up.
You stop making sexual jokes you would normally make with your friends or other average looking girls.
You want to work on eradicating all of these inhibitions for you to unveil your true self around attractive girls.
Make It About Her To Get Her To Like You
What do you think is the favorite conversation topic for most people?
Most people’s favorite conversation topic is themselves.
Girls love talking about themselves.
And the more they talk about themselves, the more they will feel a connection toward you, and the more she will start to think about you.
It is actually funny how it works because most people think others will feel more connection toward them if they just blast them with their personal stories and thoughts.
But this is quite far from the truth.
People actually feel more connection with you when they reveal something about themselves.
When they reveal something important about themselves to others, their brain starts to rationalize that they must like the person for them to reveal such personal information.
And they start to feel closer to that person.
So, your goal as a man is to make it easy for a girl to want to talk about herself.
But, you obviously do not want to be bombarding her with questions right off the bat.
Girls do not want to start revealing about themselves to someone that they don’t trust.
They want to make sure you are not a judgmental person who will judge what they reveal to you.
So, how can you accomplish this?
You do this by sharing your stories first.
One thing I like to do is to talk about something stupid that I’ve done recently.
I need to warn you, however, that you don’t want your entire stories to be based on talking about your embarrassing moments since that will just make her think you are not that confident.
When you share something stupid or embarrassing about yourself, that instantly makes her feel relaxed around you and breaks down that wall between you and her.
Another thing I like to do, once we get to know each other a little better, is to share one of my stories about my struggles during childhood, or pretty much anything that shows my vulnerable side.
This shows the girl that you are not afraid to put yourself out there, and that you don’t hold yourself back due to fear of other’s judgment.
And the fact that you are not afraid of other’s judgment communicates to her that you do not judge other people either.
And this will allow her to feel safe around you to share her own stories.
Once you reach this point, it’s time for you to let her talk while keeping your mouth shut.
You can sprinkle in your stories and your opinions every now and then as a way to relate to her during this phase.
But, you do not want to be spending an hour talking about every little thing about yourself at this point.
That is a great way to bore her to death and get friend-zoned.
Do not reveal everything about if you want to make a girl think about you.
Don’t make it so easy for her to anticipate your next move.
Create a little bit of uncertainty about who you are.
When she can easily read you, then you are no longer giving her brain any incentives to think about you.
Just when she is about to think she has you, do something that makes her question whether you are really into her.
Just when she thinks she has figured you out, you reveal something that makes her question if she really knows anything about you.
It is important to create that “confusion” in her brain if you want her to think about you.
The more confused she is, the more she is going to think about you to piece the puzzle together.
When you know how to sprinkle in a little bit of mysteriousness into your interaction, you will notice she starts to chase more as she gets more curious about you.
Let me give you a simple example to illustrate how you can use this principle in practice.
Let’s say a girl asks what you do for a living.
Instead of just telling her what you do, you can tell her, “I am not sure if you would really want to know…”.
Saying something as simple as that can engage her brain to go into that spiral of thoughts as she tries to figure out what you are all about.
Use it sparingly since it’s best to use everything in moderation.
Arouse Emotion To Get Her Thinking About You
We think about someone who arouses a certain emotion in us.
Why do we remember each and every detail of everything that was going on around us at the moment of tragedy, or upon hearing some shocking news?
It is because our emotion was strongly aroused.
We rarely ever forget whatever we were doing at the time of our emotional peak.
Any and everything we were doing at the time of our emotional peak becomes permanently embedded into our brain.
So, if you want to make a girl think about you, it only makes sense for you to arouse emotion in her.
You can arouse strong positive emotion in her by having the most amazing time together.
You may even arouse strong negative emotion in her, and that will often accomplish the same effect of making her remember you and think about you.
Most men are boring and blend, and they fail to make a girl feel anything when she is with them.
Maybe, you tend to stay within the “safe” topics when you are having a conversation with a girl.
Maybe, you have sex with her in the same boring and repetitive manner.
Maybe, you guys eat at the same place and hang out at the same place every time.
What does our brain do when everything becomes predictable?
It just zones out. It does not actively process whatever that we do anymore, once everything becomes repetitive.
There is no more emotional response when we do things that we have done hundreds of times in the past.
And that is why she won’t be thinking about you anymore.
Create a Vacuum
If what we have discussed at the beginning of this article is more about becoming an attractive man who is worth thinking about, the latter portion of this article is more about using “tactics” to get a girl to think about you.
So, take the things we discuss in this section as just a little spice on top of your main food.
Do not make a mistake of basing your entire interaction with women on these tactics alone.
It can work in the short term, but you will get a much better return on investment by focusing your effort on becoming a truly attractive man in the long run.
With that out of the way, let’s talk about what I mean by creating a vacuum to make her think about you.
When you meet a girl, you generally say and do things that will build rapport with her in one form or another.
As a rule of thumb, you want to stay away from showering her with compliments or showing too much interest, but you will have to show enough interest for her to realize that you are into her.
As she gets to know you better, you will become emotionally relevant in her mind.
When you become emotionally relevant to her, you become a source of her validation.
But, here is the thing.
We only appreciate “highs” when we experience “lows”.
You can believe what you want, but that is unfortunately how our brain operates.
Your validation loses its meaning when a girl feels like she no longer has to work for it.
When this happens, your girl will slowly stop thinking about you and start looking for another source of validation.
So, how can you find that fine balance between being her source of validation, and making her realize she can’t take your validation for granted?
Let me illustrate this point with a story so you can better understand.
I used to see this one beautiful blonde girl, and I was very attracted to her.
And I did not hesitate to let her know that I find her adorable as long as she was reciprocating about the same degree of interest I had for her.
Most of the text messages I sent her during this phase were very flattering and charming, to say the least.
Anyway, we were supposed to meet one day, but she could not make it.
And all she texted me was, “Sorry, I don’t think I can make it tonight”.
So, did I continue to text her in a sweet and loving way, assuring her that it’s perfectly fine and I hope she feels better?
I replied to her with just a “thumbs up” icon.
It only took a few minutes for her to call me to explain that she’s had an argument with her parents, and she was stressed out because she didn’t do well on her exam.
Had I continued to validate her poor behavior, she most likely would not have bothered to put any effort into explaining herself.
But, I took my validation away when she disappointed me (Not because she didn’t show up but because she failed to provide a clear explanation for not showing up).
That made her feel that “void”, and she couldn’t help but think about ways to get my validation back.
So, if you want a girl to think about you and chase you, then validate her when it’s appropriate, but don’t forget to also take it away when she does not deserve it.
Anyway, that is it for my tips on how you can make a girl think about you.
I wish you the best of luck in your endeavor to make her obsess over you instead of the other way around.