How many times have you heard dating coaches say, it doesn’t matter if you are short as long as you have confidence?
When I first started learning about seduction, there was this commonly spread belief that your looks, height, money do not matter, and it is all about your personality when it comes to attracting women.
But, there was also another group of people who believed it is ALL about looks, height, and money and your personality do not mean jack when it comes to attraction.
As with everything else in life, the truth lies somewhere in the middle.
But I can tell you this from years of going. It is not as bad as you think if you believe you are forever doomed because you are short as a man.
So, let’s talk about what you should do if you want to get that dream girlfriend as a short man.
So, what sort of insights can I offer you about dating as a short guy when I’m above average in height?
While I am not exactly short myself, I was surrounded by family and friends who are below average in height, and I have seen what shorter men are capable of when it comes to dating.
My older brother is around 5’3~5’4 (165 cm), and he lost his virginity around the age of 13 while I remained as a virgin until the age of 26.
One of my best friends is a short (5’3) Filipino dude who pretty much got better results with women than anyone I know.
And I’ve been out with countless men who are below average in height throughout my years of going out, and I have seen with my own eyes how much height actually matters.
And, here is the truth I want you to realize if you are a short male.
You are going to face more rejections than a taller, good looking man.
That is just a cold hard truth.
Anyone that says, otherwise, is just trying to sell you a dream.
Now, don’t get me wrong. That is assuming everything else is equal (which is a big assumption).
But height matters just like every other qualities, such as your face, body, money, etc.
So, if you want to get your ideal girlfriend as a short guy, then you simply must accept that it is going to take more effort than others who are more blessed with their genetics.
You cannot fear rejection. You need to accept that there is going to be a ton of rejections and be okay with that.
Your mindset as a short man is to filter through all the superficial women who are not the right fit for you.
But, I can assure you that if you are willing to endure that process, then you will find beautiful girls who like you despite your height.
My older brother has done it. My Filipino friend has done it. And many other shorter men I’ve met in the past few years have done it.
You have to cultivate such a strong mindset to the point that, even if a girl flat out rejects you or insults your height, you can walk away with a smile and talk to another girl without any downtime.
And that is exactly what my short Filipino friend did when he was out talking to girls.
It made zero emotional impact on him when women rejected him.
He simply moved onto the next girl instead of dwelling over rejections.
The problem with a lot of short men is that most of them are not good at handling rejections.
When they are rejected by women, they simply use that to confirm their worthlessness instead of using it as a fuel to talk to that next girl.
It is also crucial to develop the ability to laugh at yourself if you are short.
This is not only limited to shorter men, but it also applies to anyone with any sort of physical flaws.
You can’t take yourself too seriously if you want to get good with girls (or find your ideal girlfriend).
When you walk around with that heavy energy filled with anger and insecurities, you are going to repel every girl away.
It is especially important for a short man to be able to laugh at himself because there is a belief that short men have an inferiority complex.
When you act like an insecure person, then she will automatically assume it is because of your physical disadvantage, and your value will further dip in her eyes.
On the other hand, if you are able to laugh at your own flaws and adopt that carefree energy, then that will instantly make you stand out among the crowd.
You need to be careful, however, to not go overboard with this.
The first few times you make fun of your own flaws may communicate that you are a cool dude who doesn’t take things seriously, but if you constantly make jokes about your flaws, people will eventually assume you are doing it out of insecurity.
So, it is clear that you don’t bring height to the table if you are short.
You then need to ask yourself, what else do you bring to the table?
It does not necessarily have to be money or other physical possessions as many men believe (although it can be, if that is what you’ve got).
But, it may be your ability to make her laugh every time you guys hang out.
It can be your ability to capture her attention with your impeccable charisma and confidence.
Or it may be your unique talent that makes you stand out.
Whatever that may be, you need to find your strength, and that is where self-awareness comes in.
You need to have enough self-awareness to be able to figure out your strengths and weaknesses.
You need to figure out some of your qualities that make you stand out.
For example, if your natural strength lies in humor, then focus on turning that into an even bigger strength.
What a lot of men do is they focus their time and effort on something they are not built for.
This means it may take them a decade to even become mediocre at whatever they are trying to get good at.
But, if they focused their effort on improving their existing strength instead, they would have been so much further ahead of everyone.
Can you imagine Lebron James spending his entire life trying to become the best table tennis player instead of focusing on his natural strength (Basketball)?
He would have wasted his entire life chasing after something that he was never meant to excel in.
But, he chose to stick with something he is naturally good at, and he ended up achieving the level of success and fame that most average men can only dream of.
So, how does this relate to improving your dating life and finding a dream girlfriend as a short man?
We are all drawn to someone who is talented and possess unique ability.
And there is no “one” talent that attracts women (and people) into your life.
Women have different tastes. Some are attracted to athletes. Some are attracted to comedians. Some are attracted to musicians, and some are into actors.
What matters more is how much you excel in whatever talent you possess.
If you can cultivate your talent to the point that it stands out from everyone else around you, you will most likely naturally attract women (and friends) into your life.
At that point, it is just a matter of having a basic social skill to be able to carry a normal conversation with girls that come into your life, and knowing how to progress interaction, so it can turn into something more meaningful.
It is especially important to demonstrate the quality of a strong leader if you are short.
When you are out with a woman and you can’t make decisions to save your life, then you can kiss your chance good bye with girls.
Your lack of leadership will make you appear even shorter than you actually are, and it is going to be a big turn-off for most women.
But, if you are able to lead a woman like how Napoleon led his troops across the Alps (Ok… maybe that was a little too dramatic but you get my point…), then your height is not even going to cross her mind.
Think about one of the primary reasons why girls prefer tall men.
It is because women feel like taller men are strong, and they make them feel more protected.
So, as a short man, you need to demonstrate a strong leadership in a way that makes a woman feel like no other man can compete with you (even if they are taller than you).
Do not confuse this with trying to have your own way all the time.
That is just being an insecure, controlling freak.
But, become the man who is able to present her with options and make decisions for her during the times she feels overwhelmed.
It is okay to make bad decisions. There is no good leader who’s never made bad decisions in his or her life.
What is more important is actually making a decision and adjusting as you go, if problems arise.
This applies mostly to when going out to a bar or the club, where the girl’s preference is going to be a lot more heavily influenced by your looks.
Nonetheless, it would be useful for you to become more aware of what we are about to discuss in this section.
And I’ll be honest with you. I wish I could tell you that you should just be confident in yourself and girls will always choose you over another man.
Because it is not good for your sense of self-worth to be worried about petty things, such as if your friend is taller and better looking than you, and if it would adversely affect your chance with women when you guys are out together.
But, I value transparency (that I’ve seen and experienced with my own eyes from years of going) over spewing out idealistic BS that you have probably heard millions of times.
So, what is wrong with going out with a friend who is taller, and possibly better looking than you?
It is in our very human nature to compare when there are two options.
Let’s say you are talking to a girl by yourself. The girl may not exactly be into a short guy, but she may be attracted to your charisma and charm, and she is happy to go on a date with you when you ask her out.
Now, consider another scenario.
Let’s say you are out with a friend who is just as cool as you, but he is taller and better looking (by societal standard since “good looks” are subjective) than you.
And you guys go approach the same girl.
The girl may very well think you are a cool guy, but she can’t help feeling like your friend is a better option.
Her attention will naturally shift more toward your friend, and her preference toward a taller man will become even more amplified by the fact you guys are standing side by side.
I observed the same phenomenon even with my short Filipino friend who had no problem meeting a lot of beautiful girls.
Whenever he went out with a taller friend (Another friend of ours who was 6’5 with a British accent which is a pretty stark comparison…), he struggled a lot to hold a girl’s attention.
Even if his taller friend didn’t say anything and just stood beside him while smirking at the girl, that would often suffice to draw the girl’s attention toward him.
The girl would ask him, why he is looking at her like that with a shy smile while my Filipino friend was spitting out the best game he could to hold onto her attention.
And that is just the reality sometimes.
I want you to realize I am not sharing this story to make you feel sad and discouraged.
I want you to not forget that my Filipino friend actually had the most impressive results with women (even compared to his taller British friend).
So, if you know how to be charming and carry yourself with confidence, then you are going to do extremely well in the dating market even as a short guy.
But, it is also important for you to realize that there are situations where you will be putting yourself at a big disadvantage, if you are oblivious to how a woman’s perception can change, depending on different factors that are present.
And there is no reason for you to be voluntarily putting yourself into such a difficult position if you want to maximize your odds of winning.
It would be equivalent to a professional athlete using just one side of his limbs to compete in his respective sport.
It would make no sense to play with such a handicap if he wants to perform at the highest level.
But, I don’t want you to get so bogged down with always being hyper aware of where you are standing with the girl when you are with another man.
This will likely turn you into an extremely insecure person who emits repelling energy.
The key point I want you to take away from this is to simply be more aware of how different circumstances can affect your chances when it comes to attracting women.
Anyway, that sums up my tips on how you can find a girlfriend if you are short.
Go out and take your shot.
The right girl is waiting for you just around the corner.
I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.
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