What exactly does it take to become a man that captures eyes, and make a woman’s heart melt?
It is not easy to be an attractive man.
If it were, then there wouldn’t be men looking for answers on how to become more attractive.
Have you heard people say how the top 20% of the men get 80% of the women?
Based on my experience, it is probably more like the top 5% of the men get 80% of the “attractive” women.
And if you want to be in that top 5% of the men, it requires some effort.
The good news is, the roadmap to becoming an attractive man is out there, and that is exactly what I’m going to reveal to you in this article.
Make sure you don’t miss the last section of this article since it is arguably the most underrated (but one of the most important) part of becoming an attractive man.
Let’s get started if you are ready!
1. Improve your physical appearance
Looks don’t matter, it is all about personality!
Looks do matter, and they matter a lot.
Studies show that the importance of looks has increased for both men and women in the past few decades.
While it is true that a man puts a lot more emphasis on physical appearance compared to women, there is no doubt women also fawn over beautiful looking men.
So, what does the research say when it comes to what women find attractive in men?
A man’s v-shaped torso gives him a powerful look.
It indicates that a man has a strong body, and he is able to protect his woman.
A woman’s preference for a V-shaped body in men most likely developed because these men offered better protection against other aggressive men.
Being with a physically strong man meant a woman could better protect herself from the sexual aggression of other men of lower values.
So, what can you do to acquire a V-shaped torso?
The answer is relatively straightforward.
You want to develop your upper body musculature while keeping your body fat percentage low.
A big broad back and a well-developed shoulder along with a low body fat percentage is what gives you that nice V-taper.
Do your pull-ups, lateral raises, and shoulder presses, and don’t get fat.
That is your key to acquiring a body that is physically attractive to women.
A strong jaw and prominent brow ridges
Both of these physical traits are signs of high testosterone.
Needless to say, a lot of women are attracted to a male who displays signs of high testosterone since that is what makes a man a man.
Women usually care more about such features on a man when it comes to a short-term fling.
For a long term relationship, women put a lot more emphasis on a man’s personality traits.
So, is there anything you can do to change these?
Not really apart from surgeries.
There is no reason to dwell over things that you can’t change.
There are plenty of things you can change that will drastically help you to become more attractive.
A man’s height
I don’t think it’s any secret that women across all cultures prefer a man who is taller than them.
Women may have developed this preference because they associate a taller man to be stronger (thus, a better protector) than a shorter man.
Whatever the reason may be, it is undeniable that a taller man is treated better in our society.
For example, 90% of Fortune 500 CEOs were of above-average height while less than 3% were shorter than 5 foot 7.
There is a reason why so many women have height as one of their requirements when you browse through online dating applications.
So, what can you do to increase your height?
While there is not much you can do to increase your natural height (apart from surgery), you can start by avoiding flat shoes and wearing shoes with a bit of elevation.
It also helps to wear an outfit that makes your legs look longer as it gives the illusion of a taller height.
Your skin makes a big difference in how others perceive you.
It is true that women are more heavily scrutinized for the quality of their skin, but it is also very important for men when it comes to attracting women.
For both genders, glowing skin without acne represents health, youth, and vitality.
How many times have you heard someone say it doesn’t matter if you have a big, bulging acne as long as you’ve got the confidence! That is all that girls care about. Right? Heck Nah!
I’ve suffered from cystic acne until the age of 25 or so, and it completely ruined my confidence and made it extremely difficult for me to maintain eye contact with others.
I don’t think it is a coincidence that I had finally lost my virginity (at the age of 26) by the time I managed to clear up my acne.
I wanted to really clear up this point (that it matters to have an attractive face as well as a clear skin) because there is a lot of misconception surrounding this.
I can assure you that anyone who says your looks only matter for the first 20 seconds doesn’t know what he or she is talking about.
When a girl interacts with you, she will be spending a bulk of her time looking at your face and your eyes.
If you have a weird facial asymmetry or a huge pimple, it is going to “continuously” affect how she is going to view you (although, she will get used to it, to some extent, after spending some time with you “if” you even get a chance to see her again).
Now, I’m not saying this to discourage you if you don’t have the most beautiful looking face, but I’m merely saying this to encourage you to improve whatever that is possible to improve.
If you have severe acne, then do whatever it takes to clear it up.
For me, the only treatment that worked to clear up my acne is Accutane.
I’ve tried any and every drug out there for acne, but nothing worked until I hopped on Accutane. My skin completely cleared up in less than 3 months, and my acne never came back.
I do need to note, however, that it can potentially cause some severe side effects, so you should always consult with your doctor before you decide to go forth with it.
Your oral hygiene
I believe everyone knows the importance of symmetrical, white teeth when it comes to attracting the opposite sex.
I can’t even recall how many times I’ve heard a girl say she needs her man to have a good set of teeth.
I’m sure you know the importance of brushing and flossing your teeth daily, so I won’t bother mentioning it.
If you can afford it, I also urge you to consider getting braces if you don’t have the most visually appealing teeth.
Your teeth make a big difference on your first impression, so it will be worth the investment.
If you think what you wear doesn’t make a difference, then you lack social awareness.
Do you think you would treat someone who looks homeless the same way as you would treat someone with an expensive suit?
Many people would say yes to that question, but it would be a very different story if you actually observe them interacting with the two people in the above scenario.
We subconsciously treat people with more respect when they are wearing a good looking outfit.
In one study, girls were shown two pictures of the same exact person.
In one picture, the man was wearing a uniform from a fast-food chain.
In another one, he was suited up looking like the CEO of the company.
Almost all women in the study said they would consider going on a date with the dude when they saw the picture of him in his suit and tie.
And almost all of them said they won’t when he was wearing a fast-food uniform.
A good looking outfit can serve as a great equalizer for men who aren’t exactly most genetically gifted physically.
But, the first step to a good outfit starts with a healthy body.
It doesn’t really matter how expensive your clothes are if you are wearing them on a body that is out of shape.
It is not an easy solution, and it takes time, but it is worth the effort to sculpt a good body.
Once that is taken care of, it is just a matter of wearing something that fits your body.
Make sure there is no slack in your clothing whether you are wearing a shirt or a pair of jeans.
2. Take care of your personal finances
So, how much does money really matter?
Is it really all about money as some people proclaim when it comes to attracting women?
I’ve met way too many rich men with good careers who struggled with women to believe that money alone can attract girls.
In my years of going out, it was not uncommon for me to come across a doctor, a lawyer, or a dentist who did terrible with women despite their financial success.
For a lot of them, their parents brainwashed them into believing that women will chase once they get a stable career with a nice house.
But, little did they realize that they first need to know how to attract a girl to even get a chance to show off their money.
Don’t get me wrong. Money is great.
Your ability to make money says to a woman that you are likely intelligent, resourceful, and possess a skill that other people value which are all attractive qualities in men.
On top of that, you can usually provide women with better experiences on your dates when you have enough money.
You are able to take her to more expensive restaurants.
You can travel to better places.
You can afford to live on your own which makes it easier to bring a girl back home as opposed to living under your mom’s basement.
Being able to make money is one of the most valued skills in our society, and you will naturally gain more respect from women when they find out you are financially successful.
So, I do not want you to get any wrong idea that having money doesn’t help for attracting, and more importantly, keeping women.
What you do not want to do, however, is to walk up to a woman and start boasting about how many cars you have, and how much money you have saved up in your bank account.
Most women do not respond well to a man bragging about himself.
No matter how many positive qualities you possess, you become a try-hard in most women’s eyes as soon as you start boasting.
So, it is better when a woman just naturally finds out about your success as she spends time with you as opposed to you trying to flash the money you have in front of her face.
Even if you manage to attract a woman that way, you will be attracting the wrong type which won’t do you any good in the long run.
With that being said, I do believe it is extremely important that you at least become self-reliant.
It is hard to respect yourself if you can’t even afford to pay your rent, and you have to rely on your parents at the age of 25.
In such a scenario, your confidence will hit rock bottom, and it is most likely going to show in your interaction with women.
As woo-woo as it may sound, a man who is on his purpose and is going somewhere in life, usually beams with confidence.
And that confidence will appear more attractive to women than whatever materialistic success that comes along with it.
So, go ahead and make as much money as you please, but don’t wrongly assume that everything else will come to you as soon as you attain materialistic success.
It won’t unless you also gain massive status as a result of your success.
3. Elevate your status
Your status truly plays a significant role in attracting women.
In fact, it is so powerful to the point that a lot of women will ignore all of your flaws to be with you if you are the highest status man in a given environment.
So, what exactly makes you high status?
You are a high-status man when you are the leader in your environment.
People respect you, admire you, and want to spend more time with you.
You have the power and authority to influence people.
These are all markers of a high-status man in his environment.
I hope you noticed how I mentioned: “in a given environment”.
When we talk about status, we are not necessarily talking about the status of a celebrity or a professional star athlete.
You could simply be a social guy at the gym, and you will be perceived as a high-status man (compared to other men there) in that environment.
Everything is relative.
As long as you appear higher status than others in whatever environment you are in, a woman will usually feel a stronger attraction toward you than other men that are present.
I’m very careful in saying that because I don’t want you to turn into some try-hard weirdo who tries to be domineering under every circumstance.
Contrary to what you may think, the best way to become a high-status man in your environment is to become the most caring person who offers the most value to everyone else in the environment (without being a pushover).
When you become someone who is not interchangeable with anyone else, you will be one step closer to raising your status.
So far, we’ve talked about the importance of being a high-status male to attract the opposite sex.
I want to now cover some of the behaviors you can adopt to convey your status to people that you interact with.
So, how can you convey your status with your voice?
A study shows that a high-status person in a given environment talks at his own pace and volume while a lower status person tries to copy the way that the higher status person speaks.
This means you want to avoid copying the way the other person speaks unless you want to assume a lower status in an interaction.
You also want to avoid speaking with a voice that goes up in pitch at the end of your sentence.
That is called a rapport seeking tonality, and people who desire to be liked another person usually speak this way.
If you are a high-status male, it does not make sense for you to try to seek rapport with another person.
You would simply express your authentic self to the world, and naturally, attract those who are the right fit for you.
Look into people’s eyes with unwavering eye contact.
Show the world you are not afraid of anything, and that you have nothing to hide.
A high-status man is not afraid to make eye contact with another person.
This doesn’t mean you have to stare at the other person the whole time.
It is natural to look away every now and then.
What you do not want to do, however, is to “abruptly” break your eye contact with another person.
That communicates you are nervous, and you are not feeling comfortable in yourself.
And this is not just limited to your eye contact.
Whatever behaviors you engage in, don’t do them in a rushed, abrupt manner.
Rather, move in a relaxed and controlled manner.
How you move
Yes, it is important to stand straight up and not look down.
But, there is one thing that is even more important than all of that.
And that is, how comfortable you feel in your body when you move.
It doesn’t matter how amazing your posture is if you are tense and rigid.
That, in itself, is a sign of low-status since there is no reason for a high-status male to feel anxious in front of others.
Would a King feel nervous when he is talking to his servant? (I’m not saying you should view people as your subordinates when you talk to them, but it is just an example to illustrate the point)
You want to be relaxed when you move.
When you move with ease and confidence, you will often naturally assume a good posture, and it will draw positive attention from others.
In regards to helping you feel more relaxed on a day-to-day basis, I’ve personally found meditation helps significantly. I recommend you give it a try if you aren’t doing it already.
So, pay attention to how relaxed you feel in your body, first and foremost.
Then, you can focus on making improvements to your posture.
As a side note, do not be afraid to take up some space when you are standing or sitting down.
It is obviously a bad look to go overboard on this by spreading your legs out as wide as you possibly can when you are sitting down.
But, I see a lot of men standing with a very narrow stance while hunching forward to make themselves look small as a result of a lack of self-confidence.
Don’t be afraid to assume a little wider stance and stand tall.
Once again, a lot of your issues are going to resolve themselves once you learn how to be comfortable in your own skin.
But, it is also useful to have an idea of how to carry yourself in a proper manner since you may have some ingrained habits that need a little more conscious effort to fix.
4. Adopt an attractive lifestyle
Why do some rich people swim in the sea of women while others (who are equally rich) struggle to get attention from even one woman?
It can certainly be due to a difference in perceived status, but it can also be due to a difference in lifestyle.
When you frequently do cool things, such as hosting a big fancy party, wakesurfing, skydiving, and cruising on an expensive boat, then women are going to want to join you.
For me personally, I cannot be bothered to do all of those different activities (even if I had money for it) because I’d much rather just stay home and read or chill.
If you’ve got the money and the energy to engage in those cool little activities on a consistent basis, you will have a heck of an easier time attracting women when you invite them out to join you on your adventures.
Once you start hanging out with a couple of women, you can encourage them to invite their other female friends to join, and it will just be a matter of time before you are surrounded by so many women that you should be able to handpick whoever you want.
But, this obviously would not be an ideal route for you if you are an introvert like me, and you prefer to be left alone most of the time.
5. Transform your personality
Your personality (or game) is hugely important when it comes to being an attractive man.
There was a time I believed that attracting women is all about confidence and personality.
And there was also a time I was so jaded that I believed attracting women is all about looks and money.
As with anything else in life, the truth lies somewhere in the middle.
But to be frank, having a good game with women will carry you a lot further than what most men may believe.
Throughout years of going, I’ve met so many men who held a false belief that you need this and that to attract women.
“I first need money to attract women…”
“I need to lose weight before any woman shows interest in me…”
“I am too old (or too young) for any woman to take an interest in me…”
These are just a few of the many limiting beliefs I’ve heard other men spew out.
Take a look at me, for example.
I was consistently getting with an attractive 18~19-year-olds while I was nearing the age of 30 as an Asian man (not exactly considered the most attractive race in North America).
I was living with my parents at the time, and I could not even afford to have my own place nor did I have a proper career.
And no, I did not lie about myself to attract these girls.
So, how were all these possible?
Because I knew how to talk to women. I knew how to arouse their emotions in a way that made them “feel” something when they were with me.
So, if you ask me how far your personality can take you in terms of having success with attractive girls, I would say pretty freaking far.
But, what exactly are the most important personality traits of an attractive male?
Let’s try to decode that in this section.
Your sense of humor
Your ability to make a woman laugh can possibly be the biggest weapon you can possess for attracting women.
Having a good sense of humor comes in handy in many situations.
You are providing a woman with positive emotion when you make her laugh which is always a good thing.
You can make a woman laugh to make her feel more comfortable when she is feeling nervous.
It is also a sign of a healthy brain (which is desirable by women) when you are witty, and you can come up with good jokes on the spot.
You want to be careful, however, to avoid making too many self-deprecating jokes to make a woman laugh.
A lot of men rely on making fun of themselves to make a woman laugh.
It can certainly communicate some good things about you, such as letting a woman know that you are not so uptight to the point you can’t even joke about your insecurities.
But, if done in excess, it will make you appear insecure, and it is going to bring your value down in a woman’s eyes.
The importance of being playful
Everyone wants to have more fun, and we all want to feel light and not take things too seriously.
And that is exactly what you are helping a woman feel when you are playful.
In fact, I recommend you adopt a playful undertone with whatever you say and do.
That is how you become a man who gets away with whatever he says.
It is really hard for a woman to get offended and mad at you when you are being playful with her.
There is certainly a time and a place for getting a little more serious and sharing your vulnerabilities to connect with her on a deeper level.
But, you do not want the overall energy to get too heavy when you are hanging out with her for the first few times.
Why it is good to tease a woman rather than complimenting her
So, why is it more attractive for a man to tease a woman rather than complimenting her?
This especially holds true when you are interacting with an attractive woman who has been showered with compliments all throughout her life.
By teasing a woman, you are communicating to her that you do not put her on a pedestal.
You are indirectly letting her know that you are not so attached to impressing her.
And your lack of neediness actually ends up making her want you more.
As we’ve said in the previous section, it is important you maintain a playful undertone when you tease a woman.
Otherwise, she may wrongly assume you are insulting her and get mad at you.
Anyway, that about sums up my advice on how you can become more attractive as a man.
You now possess all of the knowledge you need to be attractive as a man.
But, are you willing to take massive action to transform yourself?
I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.
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