How many times have you heard girls say that they only like tall guys? So, are you really forever doomed if you are short, and you don’t meet that height requirement as a man?
There is no denying that being tall as a man is an advantage. Girls do indeed prefer tall guys with all else being equal. But, height does not matter as much as what a lot of shorter men think. Go out to a big city and look around. Do you only see tall guys walking around with cute girls? No, that is clearly not the case.
As cliché as it sounds, confidence really does triumph over physical attributes in a lot of cases.
Let me illustrate my point with real-life examples.
Do Girls Really Only Like Tall Guys?
I’ll be honest with you. I’m not exactly short especially for an Asian man (at around 5’11 or 180 cm).
Some may even consider I am pretty tall for an Asian guy.
It is a decent enough height for it to not be a disadvantage when I interact with the majority of women.
On the other hand, my brother is around 5’4 (or 165 cm).
He is short even by Asian standard, and being short is a real disadvantage contrary to what some dating coaches may say.
But, if it was all about height, I should have had no problem attracting girls as a tall guy while my brother would have had to struggle a lot being a short Asian guy.
So, here is an interesting fact I want you to consider.
At 180 cm tall, I was a kissless virgin until I was 26 years old.
My brother, on the other hand, lost his virginity at the age of 13 years old, and he had no problem whatsoever meeting girls throughout his entire life (and no… he’s not good looking by any means).
So, if the height is as important as what most men believe, where did this difference come from?
Women Like This More Than Tall Men
And the answer really comes down to your confidence.
I have been noticing a trend of a lot of men obsessing over their looks, such as height and facial aesthetic because they believe those are what they need to get women.
And if you are one of them, then I understand. I’ve been there as well.
It’s a lot easier to just blame your genetic features rather than focusing on things that you can actually improve.
The latter requires effort, and no one likes to hear that they can change if they are willing to endure hours of work every day to get to that next level.
We all want a quick fix. And if we can’t get it, we would rather focus and blame our shortcomings on something that is out of our control.
This obviously does not do anything nor does it improve your situation.
But, “confidence” is a pretty ambiguous term without clearly defining how it can specifically be applied to meeting women.
So, what kind of confidence do you need as a short man to have a shot against tall men in the dating market?
First, you need enough confidence to approach a girl.
It will add a few centimeters to your height in a girl’s eyes if you are able to approach her with confidence.
Without initiating an approach, nothing ever happens.
It doesn’t matter if you are tall or extremely good looking, you are still going to severely limit your option if you fail to take that initiative as a man.
I have quite a few friends who are so tall and good looking to the point they get compliments from random girls nearly every time they go out to a bar or the club.
But, those women still almost never take the first step to engage in conversation or ask their number.
Whether you like it or not, you are still expected as a man to initiate and lead along every step of your interaction with women.
So, no matter how amazing you are in terms of personality and looks, you have to take the plunge and ask her out.
And this was one of the biggest reasons why I stayed a virgin until I was 26 years old.
I was so dearly afraid of rejection that I never ever initiated a conversation with girls.
It was not until the pain and fear of being alone overshadowed the fear of rejection that I decided I needed to learn how to talk to women.
If you want to have abundance in your life, whether they be women, money, or fame, you simply must conquer your fear.
Otherwise, you will never ever be able to reach your full potential.
Another layer of confidence you need is a confidence to lead the interaction.
You absolutely must learn how to lead and be assertive if you want to compete against tall guys as a shorter man.
The girl may very well have been attracted to you, but her interest level is quickly going to dip once she realizes you are a timid guy who is afraid to take charge of the interaction.
Whether you are tall or short, there really is no glory in being timid as a man.
If you are timid as a girl, you will still get approached by other men, and you will still have options in your dating life.
If you are timid as a man, you are just a virgin loser who is left with no choice but to masturbate in the dark corner of your room.
If you are a short man, then it is imperative you embody these traits of a confident and assertive man.
Women are not going to make it any easier for you compared to tall guys.
They will give you more BS to deal with, and they will sometimes even blatantly insult your short stature.
And that is why it is important to master what we are going to discuss next.
If you are a short guy, then you really need to master the art of indifference.
You will inevitably come across some women who will mock your physical traits when you go out and talk to a lot of girls.
You cannot let those insults get to your head.
But, how do you accomplish this?
The first step is to stop defining your sense of self-worth with height.
If you define your worth based on how tall (or short) you are, then you would feel like your entire identity is under attack when a girl insults your height.
Ask yourself this question.
How much time do you spend a day on average obsessing over your height?
How often do you complain about how short you are, and how you wish you were tall?
Do you routinely talk about height during a conversation?
If your mind constantly focuses on something, then your mind is going to put more value on whatever it is that you are focusing on.
If all you think about is your height throughout the day, then your mind will start forming an illogical conclusion that all women care about is height.
Stop those negative loops in your brain, and practice shifting your attention to something more productive rather than fixating on your insecurities throughout the day.
Start defining your sense of self-worth with something that is actually within your control, such as your character, values, and personalities.
Some people may say you are just trying to “cope” by doing this.
But, that could not be further from the truth.
Every woman has a different preference, and there are plenty of women who do not put heavy emphasis on a man’s height.
When you start putting less emphasis on superficial traits, then you will naturally start to attract women who care less about superficial qualities in men.
Generally speaking, you really do attract who you are.
So, you want to develop a mindset and qualities of the type of women you want to attract in your life.
In that sense, you are being “practical” rather than “coping” since you are simply doing what will yield the most optimal result for yourself.
When you go out and talk to women with this new and improved mindset, you will realize their insults really don’t faze you.
It does not matter if they call you short and ugly because those are not the metrics you use to define your self-worth.
You are grounded in your own reality, and you are the one who decides how you are going to define yourself.
My short friend who was a womanizer
I want to talk about my short Asian friend who completely killed it with women.
And no, he did not just go for short Asian girls.
He specifically only went for taller White girls because that was his type (And I only mention that because there is a lot of misconception that short Asian men can’t attract White girls or girls from other races apart from their own).
He is about 5’4 (163 cm) tall and he isn’t exactly the best looking guy either.
What he did have, however, is rock-solid confidence and a sense of entitlement that he deserves nothing less.
Don’t get me wrong.
It was not unusual for him to get rejected, and quite a few girls would even go as far as being very blunt about how he is too short for them.
But, here is the difference between him and other short men who struggle with women.
He did not let those rejections slow him down.
When one girl rejected him, it did not faze him whatsoever, and he quickly moved onto the next.
He did not waste even a micro-second dwelling over bad reaction from girls or doubting his worth when a girl harshly rejected him.
In fact, he would think, “Why should I obsess over what one girl thinks about me when I could be talking to ten other cute girls during that time?”
And that is the type of mindset you absolutely must cultivate if you want to have abundance in your dating life, as someone who doesn’t fit the ideal image of a man portrayed by the media.
Many men spend so much effort obsessing over how they can get women without experiencing rejection.
And I am here to tell you there is no such thing as a man who gets a lot of women without going through a metric ton of rejections (I’m speaking for average guys without fame or status).
This is especially the case for men who don’t fit the image of an ideal man.
If you are ugly, short, racial minority, or fat, you have to accept and be okay with the fact that you are going to experience more rejections than people without those disadvantages.
Here is the good news, however.
As long as you become okay with going through a lot of rejections, you will eventually find that girl who will love you for who you are despite your flaws.
She may say she only likes tall guys but…
I want to make one final point for my short brothers out there.
I want you to pay attention to what women do rather than what they say.
Women would often tell my short Asian friend that they are not interested because of his height, but they would still stand there and talk to him.
Instead of paying attention to the words girls were saying, my friend paid attention to their body language.
Even if the girl told him he is too short, if she stood there and talked to him, he took that as a sign of interest.
By assuming his value and not letting rejections faze him, he was able to meet so many beautiful women that short men should not be capable of meeting (Based on what our society wants you to believe).
Growing up, we are often led to believe that we need to be this and that for us to be desired by the opposite sex.
That type of mentality stifles us from being comfortable in our own skin and putting ourselves out there.
It is hard to be okay with yourself when those little voices in your head are constantly telling you: “You are not tall enough”… “You don’t have enough money”… “You are ugly”.
But, you must work toward eliminating these voices one by one and eradicate any little bit of fear and inhibition you have in your system for you to level up as a person.