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Do girls like Asian men, or should you give up on dating if you are Asian?
You will discover the truth in this article.
Let’s dive right in.
It would be a lie if I told you it isn’t harder for an Asian man to have a kick-ass dating life in the Western-influenced culture (US, Canada, Australia, etc).
Some dating coaches may tell you to man up and stop using something that is out of your control as an excuse (race, in this case).
While I don’t particularly disagree with that statement, there is one flaw to that.
It is impossible to come up with the best solution if you don’t have an accurate idea of how things are in reality.
And the reality is that Asian men are at a significant disadvantage when it comes to attracting the opposite sex.
I want to point out I’m not making this statement from the perspective of an angry virgin who never managed to get success with girls.
Despite being a virgin for the first 26 years of my life, I turned my life around by learning how to become confident with women.
At one point, I was sleeping with two to three new White women (I’m only pointing that out because a lot of people believe Asian guys can’t pick up attractive White girls) every single week when I was actively going out.
So, it would be easy for me to say that Asian men don’t have it any harder than other races based on the type of success I’ve experienced with women.
But, here is the truth.
I’ve also frequently had girls taken by another man when my charisma and charm were still underdeveloped (and the guy who had stolen a girl from me didn’t particularly have a better ‘game’ than me apart from the fact he was NOT Asian).
I’ve also witnessed firsthand how things were like for my Asian friends, and I can tell you with confidence that things weren’t too great for most of them.
Some of them would get ‘lucky’ every once in a while because they found a cute girl who was into Asian culture (mostly at work or school).
But, almost none of them managed to attract beautiful girls on a consistent basis.
Most of them felt they were never in full control of their dating lives.
So, why is dating so difficult for most Asian men?
Asian men are generally smaller
No, I’m not talking about the size of your private part (although, that stereoptype certainly doesn’t help either).
Most Asian men are physically smaller and weaker compared to men of other races.
Needless to say, this makes Asian men appear rather effeminate.
Girls want a man who is physically bigger than them.
This can be due to different reasons, such as a woman’s desire to be protected by her man or because she feels insecure to be with a man who is skinnier than her.
Either way, you will have a better luck with women when you put on some weight on your body.
If your goal is to put on more size, there is no easy solution apart from eating A LOT of food on a consistent basis.
This doesn’t mean you can eat a lot of food for one day, and barely eat anything for the following 3 days.
You have to consistently eat a lot of food for weeks and months if you want to put on some real mass on your body.
I advise you to focus on big compound exercises, first and foremost.
When you improve your strength on compound movements, such as bench press, squat, and deadlift, you will observe the most rapid growth in your body.
But, don’t forget your diet is the most important key to putting on mass.
Asian men tend to be shy and awkward
Don’t get mad and refute this point because you happen to be the cool Asian.
Objectively speaking, I have noticed Asian men tend to be on the shy and awkward side compared to men of other races.
This may be because Asian culture does not put heavy emphasis on developing social skills.
Asian men are encouraged by their parents to strictly focus on academics from a very early age, and many of them have poor social skills as a result.
This is problematic considering your social skill (and communication skill) plays such a pivotal role in your overall happiness.
We are designed to be social creatures, so we are bound to feel unhappy if we don’t know how to connect with other people.
This is what I recommend you do if you happen to be an Asian man with not-so-amazing social skills (as I once was).
I want you to make an effort to make a small talk with any and every person whenever you see an opportunity.
You can strike up a conversation with someone while you are standing at a bus stop, or you can simply talk to people you know at school or work.
This is not an easy task if you have been shy and awkward your entire life, and you are inevitably going to experience a lot of internal resistance to push yourself out of comfort zone.
But, it is a necessary evil if you want to level up your social skill. You are not going to change yourself by reading books about social skills. You need to get out of your room and interact with people.
By the way, I hope you noticed that I advised you to talk to “any and every person”, and not just girls.
If you are awkward, your primary focus should be on improving your basic social skill.
You really have no business trying to improve your skill with women when you can’t even hold a basic, friendly conversation with others.
Asian men do not know how to lead
Most Asian cultures put a lot of value on conformity.
You are not exactly encouraged to stand out (or stand up for that matter) in Asian culture.
In fact, such an act is heavily discouraged.
So, what kind of effect does this have on Asian men?
They end up as a man who does not know how to properly express what they want, and they fail to learn how to lead others.
They become followers instead of leaders.
It is perfectly okay to be a follower if your goal is to become a corporate slave for the rest of your life, but it is not exactly the most desirable quality for being an attractive man to women (or an effective leader for that matter).
A woman wants a decisive man who is not afraid to tell her what he wants to do.
No woman wants a man who tries to cater to her needs at all times.
The solution to fixing this problem is not so different than what we had discussed in the previous section.
You don’t develop the ability to lead by reading books about leadership (although, it most definitely can help at times).
Rather, you develop it by assuming the role of a leader, and learning through trial and error.
Let’s talk about some ways you can improve your ability to lead when you are interacting with a girl.
Half of the battle is expressing your desires unapologetically.
If you scheduled a date, and you would rather have a glass wine at your place rather than going to a restaurant, you need to be able to tell her what you want to do.
You most likely have a big mental hurdle when it comes to expressing your true desires with girls if you are an Asian man.
So, I want you to practice saying exactly what you want when you interact with a girl, whether it be making out with her, or asking her to come hang out at your place.
Once you get used to that, then you can start to worry about finding that ‘middle point’ where both you and the girl will be happy.
But, your balance is shifted too much to one side right now.
You need to push yourself to the other end of the scale (by doing the exercise like the one I suggested above to eradicate the nice guy syndrome), so you end up somewhere in the middle.
There is no ‘special’ way of attracting girls as an Asian guy.
If you are an attractive man, then you are an attractive man, whether you are Asian, White, or Black.
No matter what race you are, your confidence, humor, physical attractiveness will all be appealing to every girl out there.
One thing I need to note, however, is that you need to be one level above men of other races if you want to experience the same level of success as them.
As an Asian man, you need to be a little more confident, a little more funny, and take a little better care of yourself.
Is it unfair? Sure.
But, on a brighter note, it means you will end up as a man of high-value in the process becoming successful with women as an Asian man.
I sincerely wish you the best of luck!
I was Introduced to the world of seduction after being a virgin for the first 26 years of life and being dumped by my first girlfriend at the age of 28. The dating world wasn't so kind to a 28-year-old Asian man who barely had any experience with girls. But, I eventually cracked the "code" and began "attracting" two to three new girls a week on average when I was actively going out. I'm not mentioning that to impress you but to impress upon you that you can take your dating life to the next level... IF you are equipped with the right knowledge and a desire to take massive action.
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