So, let’s dive right into some of the reasons why you struggle so much to get this girl out of your head.
1. She is your only option
If a girl occupies your entire mind, then is it really a surprise that you can’t get her out of your head?
The less option you have in your dating life, the more you will start to obsess over one girl.
The same idea applies for a friendship or any other form of relationship for that matter.
If you rely your happiness on one person (or just a few), then your emotions will always be at the mercy of how that person treats you.
When he or she treats you nicely, you will feel great.
But as soon as that person treats you poorly, you will feel like crap.
This is the reason why you do not want to put all of your eggs in one basket even when it comes to relationship.
This may not be the most politically correct thing to say but it is ideal if you can have ‘alternatives’ in your dating life.
This does not mean I recommend you go out and cheat on your girl tonight.
That being said, I do recommend you keep in touch with your female friends and acquaintances.
This will allow you to feel more abundance rather than scarcity, and you won’t be so easily tempted to give your power away to a woman just because you feel the urge to get your private part wet.
2. You believe she is the best you will do
This is similar to what we had discussed in the first section, but a little different.
You may understand that there is a plenty of fish in the sea, but you may still believe (consciously or subconsciously) she is the best you will ever do.
And I’m sure a lot of men feel this way after a rough break-up.
When you are feeling the pain of a break up, your brain plays tricks on you to make you believe that you will never ever find another girl with such amazing connection.
And I can tell you how half of the earth’s population is made up of women and the chances of her being your most ideal woman out of billions of women is very slim, but it is likely not going to make you feel any better.
So, what is the best way to get out of such an illusion?
It is to channel all of your energy on self-improvement.
The more you develop yourself (It can be your fitness, your knowledge, or your career…), the more your brain will become re-wired to believe that you deserve a woman who is better than her.
The best way for you to re-gain confidence at this point of time is to actually become a man who is worthy of possessing a high level of confidence.
Your physical appearance is one of the easier things to fix immediately (apart from improving your body composition which takes some time and work).
Go get a fresh haircut and buy a new wardrobe that fits your body properly.
You also want to work on developing your mind muscle via meditation and reading.
This will help you from falling into a trap of obsessing over your physical appearance alone (Balance is the key…).
When you take care of your body and you are on an upward slope in terms of your career and life in general, you will be hard-pressed to not feel like you are a catch.
3. You do nothing else with your life
The more you let your mind freely wander, the more your mind will engage in useless thoughts (i.e. the thought of a girl you are obsessing over at this moment…).
There are a few things you can do to occupy your mind during these tough times.
For my first breakup, I decided to go out every single night and talk to new girls.
I wasn’t necessarily having sex with girls on a nightly basis (since I was still not that great with women at the time), but these constant encounters with women were enough to keep my mind from obsessing over my ex.
During my most recent breakup, I decided to spend all of my time working.
I was working (mostly physical labor) 12 hours a day on average, and this absolutely prevented me from dwelling over my ex since I was just too damn exhausted do anything apart from working and sleeping.
I’ve also used intense physical exercises (hitting the gym daily for hours or learning martial arts) as a way to successfully get over my ex in the past.
It really is up to you to decide what method best suits you given your current situation.
But whatever you decide to do, you want to make sure it forces you to focus on task at hand, and it sufficiently exhausts you to the point that you have no capacity left to dwell over her when you are alone.
4. You relied on just her for emotional support
This is especially a common mistake you are likely to make if you are inexperienced in a relationship department.
When you fall for a girl, you start to revolve your entire life around her.
You eat with your girl, sleep with her, go to the movies with her, and spend every second of your day with her.
You reach a point where you have no desire to spend your time with anyone else because she is the most precious thing in your life.
And your brain will trick you into believing this is perfectly fine and normal when you are in love with a girl.
But you will quickly realize this was a big mistake when you break up with her (which will most likely happen… statistically speaking).
What you did was you essentially trained yourself to only rely on her for emotional support when you guys were together.
Now, you do not know any better than spending your time with her when you are going through a difficult time.
You would’ve had much easier time getting over her if you had not neglected your family and friends while you were with the girl.
So, I hope this serves as an important reminder for your future relationship.
Do not put all of your eggs in one basket.
Do not make a mistake of revolving your entire life around one girl.
Not only is this better for your mental well-being, but you are also doing a service for the girl.
The less you base your life around a girl, the less needy you will become.
I don’t think I need to explain that neediness is possibly one of the most unattractive traits you can possess as a man.
In sum, spend time with your family and friends even when you are in a relationship, have your own free time, and still talk to other ‘girl’ friends.
Not only will these increase your attractiveness in a girl’s eyes, but you also won’t feel so distraught if you do eventually break up with her.
5. You are lonely
You want to be very clear on whether you miss her because you actually genuinely miss her or if it is simply due to loneliness.
Unfortunately, most men are extremely bad at being honest about this matter.
It is hard for a man to admit that he can’t get a girl out of his head because he is a desperate loser without any option.
So, the first step is to be able to view your current situation as it is without lying to yourself.
I can assure you, however, that it is going to be extremely difficult for you to know if you’ve got real feelings for the girl, or if you are just settling for her unless…
You actually have other ‘options’ available to you.
But to be honest, the truth often reveals itself when you are seeing other girls who are as hot (if not hotter) as your ex.
If you hang out with a bunch of hot girls (who are as equally interested in you as you are into them), and you still feel like you can’t get over this girl, then I’ll give you a benefit of doubt that your feelings may very well be genuine.
But my guess is that more than 90% of men would easily move on from their past girl under the scenario I mentioned above.
And they will soon realize what they had initially thought was a ‘special connection’ was merely a confusion in their brain that arose from lack of options in their dating lives.
My advice will always be the same for overcoming your neediness toward a particular girl.
Go find yourself a girl(s) that is as hot (or hotter) than the girl you are obsessed with
Find something you are so passionate about that the female attention no longer becomes the first priority in your life.
There are other things you can do to speed up the process of getting over a girl, but these two are by far the most effective ways to not become so attached to one girl.
6. What you should not do if you can’t get her out of your head
I want to end this article by emphasizing this one point because I see so many men make this devastating mistake when they can’t get over a girl.
What you want to avoid at all cost is initiating contact with her (especially if the girl wanted to stop seeing you first).
If she doesn’t want to see you, the last thing you want to do is to reach out to her first over text or call.
You may wrongly assume that you can change her mind by genuinely expressing your heartfelt message.
But, that isn’t quite the case.
In reality, you are only further cementing your position as a needy, pathetic loser in her mind.
So, the only right move in such a scenario is to cut off contact with her and never look back.
That being said, I want you to be very clear on what sort of mindset you need to adopt when you cut off contact with her.
You are not cutting off contact with her as a way to win her back.
You are going no contact on her as a way to focus on your own life.
When you stop contacting her, just assume she will never come back and focus on living your life.
The sooner you accept this, the faster you are going to move on from her.
A lot of girls will want to chase after your validation once they realize you have completely moved on from them.
When a girl re-initiates contact with you, it is up to you to decide where you want to take that.
But, there is a good chance you will not want her back because you are already happy with your life.
I want you to use this time as an opportunity to learn how to be happy on your own without having to rely on girls to elevate your emotional state.
A girl does not want to date a little puppy that she can control so easily.
The more you can demonstrate you do not need her to be happy (while showing you appreciate her presence), the more she is going to crave for your attention.
Women (and men) naturally want something that is valuable, and it is no different when it comes to our desire for the opposite sex.
If a girl can so easily influence your emotional state, that indirectly communicates to her that you are a low value male, and her attraction for you will naturally fade away over time.
So, it is important that you fill up your schedule with things that you enjoy doing apart from spending all of your time with her.
I’m not the one to advocate men to act like an asshole, but it is crucial you don’t make a mistake of revolving your entire life around her.
Is it ever a good idea to tell a woman how you feel toward her, or is this a mistake that should be avoided at all cost?
After having talked to thousands of girls in the past few years, I’m quite confident I’ve figured out the answers for this question.
Let’s get started if you are ready to hear the truth.
So, why is it a good idea to stay away from complimenting a woman?
The first reason is so you do not get lumped with other desperate men who primarily rely on complimenting a woman to show their intentions.
A lot of men are quick to compliment women they find attractive because they put them on a pedestal.
And you certainly do not want women to think you are just another lame man who tries to suck up to her.
You are giving away a lot of power by starting off your interaction with a woman by complimenting her.
Don’t get me wrong. There is no doubt she is going to appreciate your compliments.
But, does that mean her attraction for you is going to increase as a result?
The answer is a clear no in most cases.
So, why are you giving away your power when you compliment a girl (before you know anything about her)?
In such a case, you are communicating to a woman you are into her before she even shows any signs of interest in you.
You automatically position yourself as a ‘chaser’.
When you start off your interaction by chasing her, it is going to be difficult for you to flip it around as your relationship with a woman progresses further.
This is obviously not ideal if you want to have a relationship that does not make you constantly feel like crap.
A relationship where you do not at least have an equal amount of power as your woman will only lower your sense of self-worth, and the relationship won’t be sustainable.
So, setting the right frame from the get-go can really help you avoid these mistakes.
So, is it ever okay to compliment a girl, or should you avoid compliments at all costs?
There is actually one circumstance where it doesn’t hurt to tell a woman that you like her.
When your perceived value is higher than the girl, your compliments can serve as reassurance to her that she is good enough for you.
If a woman already thinks you are too good for her, and you make fun of her by teasing her, she may very well feel like she doesn’t deserve you.
In such scenario, it is not exactly a terrible idea to give her some compliments.
The same exact idea applies when you are talking to a woman who is very insecure.
For a woman with a lot of insecurities, even a little bit of playful teasing can hurt her feelings, and make her despise you.
So, if a woman is insecure, it is often better to put more focus on making her feel comfortable by complimenting her, and spending more time with her.
It is not difficult to gauge what type of communication she prefers within the first few minutes of talking to her.
If her eyes light up and her face becomes brighter when you compliment her, then it is obviously a good idea to compliment her more frequently.
On the other hand, if she is more responsive to your teases, you would want to tease her more.
That being said, you never want to rely on one style of communication.
When you stick to one style of communication, she will quickly become de-sensitized to what you say, and your words will quickly lose its effectiveness.
So, it is important to strike a right balance between compliments and teases (aka push and pull).
One of the biggest problems with revealing your feelings is that it may kill curiosity about you.
Curiosity plays such an important role during the initial part of the attraction.
When you become an open book to a woman, her interest will quickly dissipate away.
Women want to win a man over.
As much as what Hollywood movie may like you to believe, women do not want to be with a desperate man who incessantly chase them.
They want a man who has a lot of options in his dating life, but chose them from the many options he had available.
Think about what it communicates to a woman if you resort to flattery when you barely know her?
This will let her know she is a ‘catch’ for you, and she will act accordingly.
Not only will this make it difficult for you to attract her, but it will likely be a one-sided relationship even if you somehow manage to convince her to go out with you.
I do need to note, however, that articulating your thoughts and feelings well can be incredibly beneficial when you are in a serious relationship with a woman.
This ability comes in especially handy when you are discussing about serious matter with your woman.
If you leave it to a woman to guess your thoughts and feelings, she will usually assume the worst.
So, it is important you learn how to clearly articulate your thoughts and feelings.
If you are constantly playing games with a woman (even when you are in a relationship), she is eventually going to get tired of you.
This is precisely why you need to work on your overall communication skill if you want to become truly good with women.
If the way you communicate with a woman is based only on gimmicks, such as negs, push and pull, and teasing, then it won’t be too long before she sees that you have no substance in your personality.
As we have discussed already, telling a woman how you feel is already as bad as it is even in person (for the most part).
So, it is generally a terrible idea to tell a woman how you feel over text.
You only communicate with your words when you text a girl.
You can’t use your vocal tonality, facial expression, or your body language to express yourself fully.
For this reason, it is unlikely your words are going to hit her hard when they are communicated to her over text.
I advise you to strictly use text messaging for setting up a date.
Whatever you want to communicate to a woman, save it for when you see her in person if you want it to have a more powerful impact.
More often than not, your attempt to flatter her will only appear pathetic in her eyes when it’s done over text.
This is the worst time to profess your love to a woman.
You are automatically going to appear needy if you show high levels of interest when a girl shows zero signs of interest in you.
Do not make a mistake of over-investing in a woman who does put in any effort to get to know you more.
The more you chase a woman who does not want to be chased, the more she will become repelled by you.
So, what is the best way to attract a woman who shows no signs of interest?
My first recommendation is to not waste your time on a woman who is not into you, but if you are absolutely determined to impress her, here is my advice to you.
First and foremost, you need to increase your value in her eyes.
Why do you think women are not attracted to you in the first place?
It is because you don’t have enough perceived value, whether it be in the form of physical attractiveness, a great lifestyle, or status.
So, the real solution (which is not easy by any means) is to elevate your value in all of those areas.
This means working on your fitness, your career, and your personality.
Not only will you attract more women when you transform into a higher value man, but you will no longer have to constantly cater to a woman’s unreasonable behavior because you are afraid of losing her.
When you have an abundance of options, you don’t have to settle for less, and your dating life will become that much better.
There are not many things in life that are worse than going on dates with a girl you really like only to have her go no contact on you.
You will soon discover the best ways (that I know of) to make a woman madly fall for you.
Without further ado, let’s get started.
Your ability to brighten up her day can be your strongest weapon when it comes to making her fall for you.
Most women, and people, in general, go about their day in a not-so-upbeat state.
They are awake, but not really present.
If you can help her feel positive and comfortable with your sense of humor, she will develop a stronger feeling for you.
This is not to say that you should bombard her with jokes every few seconds.
Trying to be funny at all times is a great way to kill the sexual tension, and make her interest in you evaporate away.
But, a few teasing or witty lines here and there will often suffice.
Whatever emotion a woman feels around you will become associated with you.
So, if you constantly make her feel positive, then your presence alone will trigger positive emotion in her.
That being said, positive emotion alone isn’t enough to make a woman fall hard for a man.
This is especially crucial during the first few times you hang out with a girl.
The more you talk about yourself non-stop, the lesser she will be curious about you.
A large part of the initial attraction depends on that curiosity.
The more a girl thinks about you, the more significant you will become in her mind.
You need to avoid spilling everything out about yourself the first time you go on a date with her.
A woman wants to wonder what you are all about.
She wants to indulge in the joy of figuring you out.
You probably wouldn’t be so excited to go to a movie when you already know the entire plot of the movie like the back of your hand.
It is no different when it comes to a relationship between a man and a woman.
Her interest level will quickly drop once she starts to feel she’s figured you out.
This is why it is important to be a little unpredictable and spontaneous at times.
It will serve as a catalyst for a prosperous relationship.
A person’s favorite topic is him or herself.
You want to focus your attention on helping her feel comfortable, so she opens up.
The more you can get her to talk about herself, the more she will become invested in you.
We generally feel a stronger attachment to someone when they know all of the little details about us.
For this reason, this is one of the most crucial components of making a woman fall for you.
But, you obviously cannot accomplish this by simply asking her one question after another.
She needs to feel you are open-minded enough to accept whatever she tells you with no judgment.
So, it is important that you first lead the conversation by revealing something about yourself.
This can be saying something stupid that you’ve done recently, or your vulnerable past.
When you first open up about yourself, you are indirectly communicating with a girl you don’t judge others (since you don’t judge yourself).
I can go on and on about different things you can say to a girl to make her fall for you.
But the truth is that a simple, attractive smile can often be enough to make a woman fall for you.
I would love to say you should smile however you want, and woman will be attracted to you as long as you smile.
But, that would be a lie.
There are certain types of smiles that are likely to take you straight to a friend-zone, and a certain type of smile that will seduce a woman.
Let’s talk about the type of smile you want to avoid if you want to make a woman fall for you.
It is best to avoid a wide ear-to-ear smile when you are talking to her.
This communicates your sub-conscious desire to seek her approval.
With such a smile, you are indirectly telling a girl that you really want her to like you, and this is obviously not very attractive to a girl.
Instead, you want to make smirking as your default smile.
A playful smirk makes you appear a lot more mysterious and intriguing than an uncontrolled smile.
It lets a girl know you are not completely sold on her yet, and you will give off an aura that you’ve already figured her out (which adds to your mysteriousness vibe)
The way you touch a woman can have a great impact on how you make her feel.
If you touch her in a tender, caring manner, then she will feel you really care for her.
On the other hand, if you touch her in a firm manner, she is going to feel your intense passion.
Words aren’t always necessary to communicate how you feel toward her.
Your touch can often be just as effective at making her feel you really care for her.
Gently touch her body when she is tired and she wants you to express your tender side, but don’t be afraid to be a little rough when she craves for your passionate love.
Your value can make or break your chances especially when you are dating a girl who is desirable to many other men.
If the girl has plenty of other options, then she has no reason to settle for average.
This is why you will never quite have lasting success with women if you solely rely on pick-up artist techniques to attract women.
You may present yourself as a cool, confident man the first time you meet a girl, but her interest will quickly dissipate away as soon as she realizes there is no substance to your personality.
So, how do you improve your value as a man?
There are lots of different ways you can accomplish this, but I want to talk about three main ways you can maximize your value, which include improving your physical attractiveness, working on your career, and improving your personality.
Get a better haircut, take care of your basic hygiene, start hitting the gym to maintain a good physique, and improve your fashion style.
It really is as simple as that.
You most likely already know what to do as well.
It is a matter of if you are committed enough to becoming a better version of yourself.
When an average man looks at a rich guy with an attractive girl, he automatically thinks to himself, “She’s only with him because of his money!”
But, I have different perspectives on this.
Yes, there are certainly gold diggers who go for rich men just because of the money they have.
But, a lot of women are drawn to men who are successful.
Most of us grew up to admire those who accomplish something magnificent in their lives, whether it be becoming a successful athlete or creating a successful business.
So, whatever success you experience in your life can easily spark admiration and respect which then can be translated into an attraction.
It is also important that you do not neglect your career for your own sense of self-worth.
Is it possible to get with a lot of attractive girls without having a nice career? Without a doubt.
Is it going to make you feel great about yourself? Maybe temporarily, but you are pretty much destined to feel like crap soon enough.
When you have to rely on others (women, in this case) to feel good about yourself, it is always going to be short-lived.
You only get a true sense of fulfillment from leveling yourself up.
So, focus on your career, not for women, but for yourself.
Your personality matters a lot.
Your ability to be carefree and have fun in your interaction with women will increase your attractiveness tenfold.
Most men struggle with too much ‘seriousness’ in their personality.
They automatically default to a ‘logical conversation’ whenever they are with a woman.
This is problematic because a logical conversation is not very effective when it comes to arousing a girl’s emotion.
And as you should know by now, the attraction only takes place when her emotion is aroused.
Even a very good looking man with a dull personality attracts a woman because he is able to arouse her emotion with his physical appearance.
So, if you don’t have to be blessed with ‘good looking man’ genetics, it is imperative you learn how to touch her emotion with your behaviors and your personality.
Why is it important to be vulnerable when talking to a woman?
Because a deep connection only takes place when two people are not afraid to be vulnerable and open up to each other.
Most men are terrible at expressing what is inside them.
The more you can bring out the thoughts and emotions that are lingering in your mind, the more she is going to be able to relate to you.
I am in no way telling you to act like an emotional cry-baby and talk about how she’s hurt your feelings and such.
That will only diminish her attraction for you.
But, when you are able to articulate yourself well, your bond will strengthen as a result.
Just don’t do it too often, otherwise, you risk losing her interest.
When a girl feels relaxed around you to the point that she can completely be herself, you will become irreplaceable.
The more you can bring out her child-like qualities, the more she will start to believe you are someone she can spend the rest of her life with.
Spending more time with her is usually the best way to accomplish this.
But, you can also speed up the process by keeping this one principle in your mind when you are talking to a woman.
Do not be afraid to be a little silly or make a fool out or yourself (to a certain point).
When a woman sees you are comfortable with yourself, she will also feel comfortable enough to show her goofy side in front of you.
Let’s first start out by talking about what you shouldn’t do after a breakup if you want to make her chase you.
It is tempting to tell your ex-girlfriend how much you miss her after a breakup.
Men have been led to believe it is best to be honest when it comes to communication with girls.
But, it is usually not the best idea to be transparent about how much you miss her after a breakup.
Your ex-girlfriend has already moved on from you.
You need to ask why she broke up with you in the first place.
It is most likely because she believes she has more to lose by being in a relationship with you than being alone.
She thinks it is a crappy deal to be in a relationship with you.
So, what do you think will happen when you tell your ex how much you love her when she thinks lowly of you?
Do you think she will suddenly have a change of heart and fall back in love with you?
The chance of that happening is quite slim.
Instead, you will only be letting her know that it was a good decision to break things off with you.
We do not appreciate things that are readily available to us.
The moment we realize we can readily access something is the moment we lose interest in that.
So, it is important that you stay away from showering her with validation when she does not deserve it.
Never pursue a girl who pushes you back.
No contact really is the best practice when you are going through a breakup.
Not only will it increase your chance of getting your ex back, but it is also the best way to move on from a girl who broke your heart.
I would love to say I possess a secret tactic to get any girl back into your arms.
But the truth of the matter is that some girls will never come back no matter what you do.
It may be that she’s gotten back with her past lover, or she’s moved to a new city.
Whatever the reason may be, you always need to be prepared for the worst.
And the good news is that no contact really is the best way to move on from your ex.
When she is out of your sight, she will be out of your mind.
The less time you are ‘exposed’ to her, the easier it will be for you to forget about her.
This doesn’t mean it is going to be easy to forget about her especially if you’ve spent a lot of quality time together in your relationship.
You are going to suffer, and you are going to cry.
But, time will eventually heal things, and going no contact will help speed up this painful process.
No contact on your ex will also intensify her curiosity.
If you guys have been in a relationship for a long time, it is going to be nearly impossible for her to not wonder what you are up to when you disappear from her life.
She will feel as if all of those times spent together meant nothing. This feeling will make it very difficult for her to not reach out to you.
When she does end up re-initiating contact, the power is now in your hands.
You are no longer the one to chase her, and she is now the one who longs for your attention.
At this point, it is much easier to maneuver the direction of your relationship to the way you desire.
I want you to realize that when I say no contact, I really mean no contact.
I advise you to block her from everything.
Block her from every one of your social media accounts, your phone number, and even your e-mail.
When you have any way of contacting her, you will likely cave into temptation.
I want you to completely delete her out of your life for at least a few months.
You can explore the option of becoming friends with her when you have moved on from her.
But, it is best to erase her out of your life until your wound heals.
Have I told you the social proof is possibly one of the strongest emotions you can arouse in a girl? (In fact, I probably talk about it in at least half of my articles because it is THAT powerful).
It is by far the most effective way to bring up your value in a woman’s eyes.
When you tell a girl about how other girls want you, then it comes off like a brag.
But, when she sees with her own eyes that other women find you attractive, it is going to serve as an undeniable proof that you are a desirable man.
So, how can you demonstrate such social proof?
The best way is to demonstrate it in person.
As I said earlier, my primary advice will always be to go no contact on her.
But in case you still have to see her whatever reason, this is what I recommend you do.
I want you to avoid initiating a conversation with her even when you see her in person. Instead, I want you to interact with other attractive girls in the environment.
You need to let her know she is no longer the center of your universe.
You obviously do not want to do this in an obvious, lame manner that clearly telegraphs to a girl you are only acting in such a manner to induce jealousy in her.
You want to act natural and actually have fun with other girls.
Not only will this induce intense jealousy in your ex, but this will make her realize she is not your only option.
And that will serve as a powerful revelation for her.
When your girlfriend feels you have no problem getting with someone who she feels is objectively better than her, your value is going to skyrocket in her eyes.
We are naturally drawn to someone who doesn’t need us.
The more you can demonstrate that your life will be perfectly fine without her, the better.
Another way to demonstrate your social proof is via social media.
You may be thinking, “But, didn’t you tell me to block her from all of my social media accounts?”
Yes, but you can bet she is going to create another account just so she can stalk on your social media accounts.
So, what type of pictures should you post?
It is best to post pictures of you hanging out with other attractive girls in a natural setting.
When it looks like you are posing for pictures to show the world that you are hanging out with hot girls, it is certainly going to appear try-hard.
For this reason, it is a lot better if you look natural in your pictures as if someone took a picture of you and the girls without you even realizing it.
That being said, I highly recommend you stay away from using any of the aforementioned advice as a ‘tactic’.
Do all of the things I’ve mentioned in this section as a natural by-product of you moving on from your ex-girlfriend.
The truth is that your ex is much more likely to come back when she senses you’ve completely moved on from her.
But, the chances are you probably don’t even want her by the time she wants you back.
During the time of heartache (from a breakup), your brain convinces you into believing she is the best you will ever come across in your lifetime.
But, as soon as you start meeting other girls, you will quickly realize there really was nothing special about your ex.
She wasn’t particularly any hotter than other attractive girls (unless you’ve dated a Victoria Secret model, or a celebrity).
And she wasn’t any more caring and compassionate compared to other nice women.
You need to realize there is no such thing as ‘the one’.
There is a ‘pool of girls’ that are compatible with you, and any and every girl is replaceable.
It may sound harsh, but it is a cold, hard truth.
The sooner you accept this, the less needy you will be with one particular girl.
The first time is always the most nerve-wracking moment for anyone.
So, what is the best way to leave a good first impression when talking to a girl for the first time?
That is what you are going to find out in this article.
This general principle we are about to discuss applies to all types of ‘first-time’ situations.
Whenever you talk to a girl for the first time, it is often best to avoid getting into a serious conversation too soon.
The female attraction doesn’t happen as a girl ‘logically’ understanding that you are the right man for her.
If that were the case, you would simply send her a resume with your pictures which goes into details about what you do and how you are as a person.
A girl needs to feel something when she is with you in order for her to become attracted to you.
The problem with having a serious conversation with a girl is that you are most likely going to bore her to death.
So you may be wondering, what is the best type of emotion to arouse in a girl when you talk to her for the first time?
While there are different types of emotions that can lead to attraction, it is always a safe bet to focus on having the most fun in your interaction with women.
But, how does this apply to a phone conversation? It’s rather simple.
You don’t necessarily have to come up with tens of witty jokes that will blow her world.
What’s important, however, is to pay attention to the way you talk.
Your tonality has the biggest influence on how a girl perceives you.
If you sound all depressed and low energy (by the way, there is a difference between low energy and having a chill vibe), then you will turn a girl off.
On the other hand, if your tone is positive and playful (without being clownish), then she is going to become more drawn to you.
Since a girl can’t see your facial expression or your body language over the phone, it is crucial your tonality is dialed in.
This means your chance with a girl can be greatly elevated (or decreased) depending on how you sound when talking to a girl.
For this reason, if you know how to use your tonality to influence a girl’s emotion, it is a great idea to call her.
You have a lot more tools at disposal when talking to a girl in person.
You can use your facial expression and body language on top of your voice and words.
If you know how to use all of these tools effectively, your chance of attracting a girl will increase exponentially.
If, on the other hand, you have no clue how to present yourself in an attractive manner using these tools, your chance will be greatly hampered.
So, let’s get into details about how best to present yourself when talking to a girl for the first time in person.
You need to be able to maintain solid eye contact with a girl.
Girls look into your eyes to figure out if you are a confident man.
If you flinch or look away when she makes eye contact, she is going to assume you are not very confident, and her attraction will dissipate away.
Needless to say, you want to stand straight up when talking to a girl, but that alone is not enough.
You also need to make sure you are fully relaxed when talking to a girl, and this is arguably more important than assuming a good, straight posture.
Even if you have the most perfect posture, you will still look terrible if you look tight and stiff.
But, when you look comfortable in your own skin despite not having the most perfect posture, you will still look fine for the most part.
So, focus on feeling relaxed in your body first before you care about good postures.
As a side note, I want to point out one of the most common mistakes that many men make when talking to attractive girls in a loud environment.
A lot of men tend to excessively lean forward (especially at the club or a bar environment) when they have a conversation with a woman.
This is a terrible habit because such behavior indicates you are desperate for a woman’s approval.
So, hold your ground and stand in your spot. If it is difficult to talk because of loud music, then simply bring her into you instead of excessively moving into her space.
This will make you appear a lot more confident than the other way around.
There is a lot of different advice when it comes to speaking with an attractive tone.
Some people say you should try to talk with a deep voice to attract girls.
Some people believe you need to vary your tones to be more expressive.
These are all correct.
However, you also risk appearing try-hard.
If there is one thing you can do to make a girl quickly lose interest in you, it is showing any signs of try-hardness.
So, here is what I suggest you do instead.
I want you to talk to girls as if you were talking to your best friend.
You wouldn’t talk with a fake friendly tone when you talk to your best friend, would you?
This will help you to act more chill and normal in front of attractive women.
Most men talk with too much excitement and enthusiasm when they talk to hot girls.
It is good to be positive and playful when you talk to girls, but it is not exactly a great idea to be filled with too much excitement.
When you act in an unnatural manner, it indirectly communicates to a girl that you are not used to being around hot girls.
It is much better if a girl thinks you are a man who is used to being around hot girls all of the time because girls want men who are desired by other females.
This is not difficult to understand considering it is in our (both men and women) nature to want something that others want as well.
Let’s talk about the most important principle to keep in mind when talking to a woman for the first time over text.
It is important to keep things simple.
Stay away from trying to be overly witty or humorous.
It once again goes back to eliminating the try-hardness in all of your behaviors.
The more you ‘try’ to leave a good impression, the less likely she is going to be impressed by your effort.
Simply texting a girl, “Hey, it was nice talking to you” will often suffice.
That being said, it is not a bad idea to make a playful remark about something funny that happened during your interaction (e.g. some drunk guy nearly throwing up on you, or how your friend was acting stupid at the party) but don’t go overboard with it.
Is there a magic line you can say to capture a girl’s heart when you meet her for the first time?
The short answer is no.
In fact, it is a terrible idea to prepare lines in advance because human interactions are filled with uncertainties.
More often than not, your pre-rehearsed lines will only come off as robotic and mechanical.
Rather, it is much better to have a few key principles in your mind when you are interacting with women.
These are some of the most important key principles I want you to keep in mind if you want to successfully leave a good impression with a girl you meet for the first time.
1. Focus on keeping your interaction playful especially when you talk to a girl for the first time.
2. Spend more time listening to her and relating to her instead of talking non-stop about yourself.
3. Stay away from overly complimenting a girl unless you actually mean it.
4. Be engaged but not overly enthusiastic (Being overly enthusiastic lets a girl know you are sold on her).
The right ‘lines’ will come out when you ingrain these principles into your brain.
I wish you the best of luck!
Should you be direct with a girl when you ask her out, or is it better to be a little more subtle?
This totally on the following points we will soon discuss in this article.
Whether you should ask a girl out really depends on her level of interest.
If the girl is into you, there is no reason to over-complicate things.
You will do fine as long as you have enough courage to ask her out.
Whether you are direct or indirect with your intention will have a minimal difference in most cases (unless you carry yourself like a complete awkward loser in front of her).
When the girl has a high level of interest, just go ahead and take your shot without over-thinking.
But, you may be wondering how you can tell if a girl has a high level of interest?
There are a couple of things you will readily observe from a girl who is into you.
When you see a couple of these signs, it is not a bad idea to make a decisive move (aka ask her out) instead of falling into the trap of paralysis by analysis.
It is a slightly different story if a girl is not that into you.
When she is not that interested in you, there is a chance you will put too much pressure on her by being too direct with your intention.
It is no different than a salesman trying to sell his product when a potential customer isn’t yet fully convinced by his sales pitch.
Such an act will only serve to push the customer away.
For this reason, it is always best to ensure the girl is into you before you ask her out to minimize your chance of hearing “no” from the girl.
Let me just make it clear why you want to avoid hearing “no” from the girl.
It is not so you can preserve your ego and feel less down about yourself.
In fact, that is a necessary part of finding your dream girl.
Rather, it is because you want to prevent the ‘commitment and consistency bias’.
To put it simply, this bias refers to our tendency to stick with our initial decision.
This means if a girl rejects you initially, then she is more likely to continue to reject your requests in the future.
And this is exactly why you want to minimize the number of times you hear no’s from the girl.
So, what then is the best way to get a girl into you before you ask her out?
This probably contradicts what a lot of dating coaches will tell you, but the quality of your interaction matters a lot more than the amount of time you spend with the girl.
Why do we frequently see girls cheating on their long term boyfriend (who they’ve dated for years) for a man they’ve only known for a couple of hours (at a club or when they are on a vacation)?
It is because the new guy was able to arouse a strong emotion in her that her boyfriend failed to arouse.
For this reason, it is important for you to arouse emotion in a girl when you are with her.
She has to feel something around you.
If you fail to do this, it is unlikely she is going to feel attraction to you.
So, let’s talk about some of the best ways to ask a girl out.
Many men, in this day and age, resort to asking a girl out over text because they are afraid of facing rejection in person.
But, that is about the worst mistake you can make if you want to really improve your odds with girls.
Not only does asking her out over text demonstrate a lack of confidence, but you are also making it a lot easier for her to say no when you ask her out over text (than if you were to ask her out in person).
Some men may argue that is not necessarily a bad thing since the girl who would say no over text is not into you, to begin with, so you would simply be saving time.
That is not completely wrong, but I don’t fully agree with it and here is why.
A woman’s emotion can drastically fluctuate on a day-to-day (or even on an hour-to-hour) basis.
Even if a girl is not ‘that’ into you at this moment, things can quickly change if you can get her out on a date with you.
But, you may have missed your opportunity to ask her out in person.
In such a case, the second-best thing to do is to ask her out over the phone.
You are able to change a girl’s emotion a lot more easily with your voice and words than your words alone.
Once again, this is important because it is not easy to influence a girl’s action without first changing her emotion, and you will have a much better success accomplishing that when you can get her on the phone.
The hardest part is getting over your fears.
Your brain will start to come up with all kinds of excuses on why it is a bad idea to ask her out in person or over the phone.
You are going to worry about embarrassing yourself in case you are rejected.
But, you need to ask if you want to play to win, or you care more about preserving your ego with nothing to show.
I want to note that it is not necessarily a bad idea to be direct when you ask a girl out depending on your circumstance.
As we had discussed earlier, it is not the highest probability move if a girl is not quite into you yet.
That being said, I’d personally recommend sticking to asking a girl out directly (regardless of high or low interest from girls) if you are living a busy life.
When you are focused on your purpose (as you should be), it helps to simplify other aspects of your life, such as dating.
It simplifies everything when you are direct with a girl, and it allows you to focus on what is actually important (aka your purpose).
This is why I recommend you do a little cost and benefit analysis when it comes to how much time you are willing to spend in pursuing girls.
If you are focused on bettering yourself, then you do not want to be micro-analyzing every little aspect of your interaction with women.
All those times spent on thinking about women are the times you could’ve spent on developing yourself.
Anyway, I hope this article helped you clear your mind in regard to the best way to ask a girl out!
Is it over when a girl dumps you, or is there any chance she will come back?
Let’s talk about a few factors that will have the biggest influence on whether she comes back to you or not.
So, why does this matter?
It matters because she is going to have an easier time moving on from you if she has a lot of friends.
The more people she has around her, the more emotional support she will have available.
When the girl can rely on her friends for emotional support, she is not going to be so attached to you.
For example, let’s say you had a lot of friends, and you lose one of your friends.
You are not going to struggle to get over him (or her) when you have a bunch of other people you can hang out with.
I hope you don’t take this as me saying you should seclude a girl from her family and friends in a future relationship just so she becomes emotionally dependant on you.
That is just going to be toxic for both you and the girl.
Rather, I want you to get a very clear picture of the reality, so you can accurately assess if you have a good chance of getting her back.
That being said, she is actually going to have an easier time getting over you if you guys had a healthy relationship where your entire lives didn’t revolve around each other.
On the other hand, there is a good chance she will struggle to get over you if you guys had a toxic relationship where you guys spent every second together.
When you have been her entire universe for a long period of time, you essentially become her drug.
Needless to say, the withdrawal effect is a lot more potent when you have become fully dependant on her emotionally.
The longer your relationship lasted with her, the more likely she is going to feel the urge to contact you.
When she shares a lot of memories with you, she is going to think about you more, and she is going to miss you more as well.
If, on the other hand, she has only known you for a short while, she is not too emotionally invested in you.
In such a case, it is going to be easy for her to move on and find another man.
So, the duration of your relationship matters when it comes to assessing if a girl will come back.
But more importantly, do you guys share a lot of amazing memories together that will make it difficult for her to erase you out of her life?
This is a mistake a lot of men make.
When a girl wants to break up, many men are quick to tell the girl how they can’t live without her and that she is everything.
I’ve made the same mistake when my first girlfriend wanted to end the relationship.
I tried to hold onto her by telling her how much she means to me.
I thought that would make her realize how much I care for her, and she would come back to me.
But the more I tried to get her back, the more she pushed me away.
It was only when I stopped chasing her, she came back crawling for my attention.
So, why did she feel no desire to come back when I was chasing her but changed her mind as soon as I stopped pursuing her?
It is because we tend to lose interest in others when we believe they are fully sold on us.
We naturally desire things that are hard to get, and we value something that we had to work for.
And that is where I messed up.
I made a mistake of fully validating my ex-girlfriend when she did not deserve it, and she started chasing me only when I took that validation away by going no contact on her.
Her past behavior is the best predictor of her future behavior.
How did she act in the past when something similar happened between you and her?
Was she the one to reach out to you first, or were you always the one to beg for her to stay?
How did she act in the past with her ex-boyfriends?
Did she have a habit of reaching out to her exes, or was she the type to erase them out of her life once the relationship is over?
While people can change, it is unlikely they are going to change in a short period of time.
For this reason, her recent past usually serves as the most accurate predictor of how she is going to act in the future.
So, what is the best thing you can do when a girl has left you?
Should you just wait for her to come back like a good little boy?
The only correct answer is to stop pursuing her.
Nothing makes you feel more pathetic than chasing a girl who is not into you.
While ignoring a girl may or may not work (to get her back), you are almost guaranteed to repel her away if you relentlessly chase a girl who does not want you.
The best thing you can do for yourself is to completely ignore her for the time being.
Cut her out of your life and focus on increasing your value as a man.
And a breakup can often be the best catalyst to upgrade your value as a man.
Pain is a great motivator for you to get off your butt and do something to better your life.
So, re-direct your focus to self rather than dwelling over your past.
Improve yourself in every area including health, wealth, and knowledge.
Don’t just come up with general plans and goals as they are sure to fail.
Set specific goals on what you want to achieve (and what type of man you want to become).
Do something every single day that will help you move closer to the type of man you want to become.
Your ex will soon be craving for your attention.
But you won’t care even if she doesn’t.
The chances are that by the time your ex-girlfriend wants to come back to you, you will have moved on from her anyway because you’ve learned to value yourself over anyone else.
What is the best course of action to take when a girl is mad at you?
Should you even bother trying to do or say anything, or should you remain silent?
You will soon discover the best way to respond to a girl who is not so happy with you.
There is a lot of men who believe that you should never apologize to a woman for your mistakes.
They believe it is a sign of weakness when you say sorry for the mistake you’ve made.
And I don’t particularly agree with that.
Not only is it a crappy behavior to never admit your mistake, but it is simply not an effective strategy even if your primary goal was to win a girl back at all costs.
Girls don’t want a man whose ego is so high that he can’t even give a simple apology for a mistake he’s made.
In fact, your willingness to admit your wrongdoing is a sign of strength.
It is usually an insecure man who easily gets defensive and refuses to acknowledge his fault.
So, go ahead and apologize if you’ve screwed up.
It is good to sincerely apologize and let her know exactly how you messed up, and that you won’t repeat the same mistake again.
If a girl refuses to accept your apologies and she tries to guilt-trip you, then that is where you draw the line.
I advise you to certainly apologize for whatever you’ve done wrong, whether it be lying to her about something, or not keeping a promise, but that is not an excuse for her to treat you like crap.
Just because you made a mistake doesn’t mean she has the right to mistreat you.
If she is being unreasonable despite your apology and your willingness to make things right, then it may be time for you to move on from her.
You are not going to be her slave for the rest of your life just because you’ve made a mistake.
It is not worth holding onto a girl who refuses to forgive you (there are certain exceptions, such as you cheating on a girl. But, in such a case, I recommend you break up with her even if she is willing to forgive you).
You should communicate to her that you understand if she finds it difficult to forgive you for what you have done, and let her know that it is probably better if you guys end things now if she is going to have a difficult time forgiving you.
Remember that you want to be a nice guy with boundaries since that is the type of man that a woman respects the most.
It is really difficult to be mad at someone that makes you smile.
This advice obviously comes with the territory.
For example, if you have blatantly deceived her or cheated on her, then your effort to make her smile will most likely be futile.
But, if you’ve just made a minor mistake, such as not replying to her text when you were out with your friend (assuming you promised her that you’d text), it is not a bad idea to try to lighten up the mood by making her laugh.
I’m sure you know best what makes your girl laugh.
It can be making a stupid facial expression or speaking to her with a funny voice.
So, make her laugh, and at the same time, let her know you are sorry for what you’ve done.
This combination will serve you well when you are trying to calm your girl down.
Make love to her with passion
This can work well as long as she is not so mad at you to the point that she’s completely lost sexual interest in you.
If a girl is mad at you, there is a lot of tension that is built up in her body.
And there are different ways this tension can be released.
She may release her tension by lashing out at you, or you can help her release that tension by making passionate love to her.
Sometimes, you just need to leave a girl alone for her to settle down.
It is very possible that your presence will only fuel her anger if she is upset at you.
So, let her calm down on her own.
You will only trigger her negative emotions by being around her when she is not ready to accept your apology.
Let her know that you will be there for her when she’s ready to talk, but it is probably better if you leave her alone for the time being.
I hope you realize by now that a consistent theme I’ve been hammering over and over again in this article is to act as a nice guy with a clear boundary.
A ‘nice guy’ often gets a bad reputation as being a pushover because most nice guys do not know how to stand up for themselves.
But, you will instantly command respect from people if you are a nice guy without being a people pleaser (much more so than a ‘bad boy’ douchebag who shows no respect to others).
The final point I want to touch on is to extract the lesson from the mistake you’ve made.
As a wise man once said, progress equals pain plus reflection.
Without reflection, you are going to repeat the same mistake over and over again.
What made a girl get mad at you?
Was it something that you did, or is it her personal issue that she needs to resolve on her own?
If it is something that you did, what made you engage in such behavior?
Are you holding onto a relationship that is already broken, or do you see potential in your relationship?
These are all questions you want to ask whenever there is a conflict between you and the girl in a relationship.
It may seem like tedious work, but it is a lot better than repeatedly making the same mistake because you never took the time to reflect back on your patterns of behaviors.
If you want to make this process productive, it is crucially important for you to be honest with yourself.
If there is something you can clearly improve, but you fail to acknowledge it because of your little ego, you won’t get much out during this process.
Remember, the first step to improvement is to accurately identify your weakness, and you can only do that when you are 100% honest with yourself.
You are about to discover the best ways to make a shy girl feel more comfortable around you.
Are you ready?
Let’s get started!
If you are naturally outgoing and extroverted, it is in your best interest to tone down your energy a little.
This doesn’t mean you should try to be a different person than who you actually are.
But, I’m sure you can agree you possess both chill and energetic sides
I simply want you to bring out more chill side of you.
So, why is this important?
It is because we are naturally attracted to people who are similar to us.
If a woman feels your personality is completely different than hers, it is likely going to repel her away from you.
I want you to take a moment to reflect back on your past interactions with other people.
Think about what type of people made you feel most comfortable?
It is likely those who had a similar personality to yours.
However, this is not an excuse for you to be boring.
It is important you keep your interaction playful and have a good, calm energy.
Just because you tone down your energy does not mean you have to make your conversation boring.
You can still crack jokes and tease her as long as you don’t appear too hyper-energetic.
You do not want to be over-the-top when you are talking to a reserved girl.
Shy and awkward girls often struggle to tolerate outlandish behaviors because they are more easily overwhelmed by a man with too much personality.
Let me give you a couple of concrete examples of outlandish behaviors that are sure to repel shy girls away from you.
These are all great ways to make a shy girl (or any girl for that matter) feel disgusted.
You need to accept that it will take more time for a shy woman to open up compared to other girls.
You can do things to speed up that time, but the best way to make her feel comfortable around you is to simply spend more time with her.
It is much like when you are going through a break-up.
There are certain things you can do to speed up the healing process, but it is ultimately time that provides the best solution for your pain.
It is important for you to realize that things are going to feel awkward at times, and you may even feel she doesn’t like you all that much.
It is hard to avoid those awkward moments with shy girls.
But as long as you spend enough time with her, she will slowly start to open up.
The nice thing about shy girls is that it may take a long time for them to open up to you, but they won’t easily turn their back against you once they open up.
One of the best ways to break the tension is to make a girl laugh.
The good news is it usually does not take much to make a shy woman laugh.
More often than not, she will appreciate the fact you are trying to help her feel more comfortable around you.
So, you are better off not obsessing over whether she is going to find your joke funny or not.
As cliché as it may be, it is the effort that matters.
The entire point of making jokes is to lighten up the mood (not necessarily to deliver the funniest jokes although that wouldn’t hurt either), so I want you to practice blurting out whatever crappy jokes you have in your head with confidence.
It is not always going to work, but it will get better over time.
I used to suffer a lot from social anxiety and general awkwardness.
Although I have become a quite confident man as a result of continually pushing my comfort zone, I have plenty of stories I can share about my anti-social moments.
And I’ve noticed it is good to share these stories with shy girls since it helps them feel a stronger connection.
When I’m with a girl, I talk about how I used to be terrified of picking up my phone to order food.
I also share stories of how my social anxiety prevented me from forming a meaningful friendship or getting into a relationship with a woman.
But, I also talk about what I did to overcome those challenges.
So, not only does a girl feel she can relate to my struggles (if she’s been shy growing up), but she also develops a certain level of respect for me due to the fact I managed to turn my weakness into a strength.
It is going to feel awkward to share your stories at first.
You may be scared of a girl judging you.
But, you need to be willing to take these ‘micro-risks’ in your interaction with girls if you want to take your relationship with a girl to the next level.
Think about what is the best outcome if you just settle for safe topics and not open up?
You may end up becoming her friend, but it is unlikely she is going to develop any special feelings for you.
On the other hand, what is the possible outcome if you open up to the girl?
There is a small chance she may judge you, but there is also a very good chance she is going to see you differently than every other guy she meets.
It is rare for a woman to come across a man who is able to express himself in an honest way, so you are going to stick out in her mind.
So, when an irrational fear creeps up before you are about to do something, I want you to always think about the potential risk versus the potential benefits.
Does the potential benefit outweigh potential risks?
Would you rather win big or save faces with nothing to show?
Answering these questions in an honest way will propel you to take the right actions.
While it can certainly be an effective strategy to show you are desired by a lot of women when interacting with a confident woman, such tactic often backfires when it comes to shy girls.
It is true that a woman likes a man that is desired by other women.
But, the problem is most shy women already do not have much confidence, to begin with.
So, if she feels you are ‘too much’ for her to handle, she may very well push you away first before she’s hurt.
For this reason, it is important you demonstrate the qualities of a man who is suited for a relationship than the qualities of a womanizer.
This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t demonstrate traits of a confident, attractive man.
It does, however, mean your attractive traits should be balanced out by ‘nice guy qualities’ that would give her confidence that you won’t turn your back against her as soon as you are bored of her.
It is tricky to draw the line between persistence and desperation.
And if you don’t know when to stop chasing a girl, you will quickly become a creep in a girl’s eyes.
So, when should you stop chasing a girl?
Everyone has a different idea of when is the right time to stop pursuing a girl.
Some men may argue that you should chase a woman as many times as you desire since you have nothing to lose anyway.
And I can partially agree with that if you are the type of man who does not mind spending all of your time and effort on chasing a girl who barely reciprocates your level of interest.
But unfortunately (or fortunately), I’m not wired that way. And you probably aren’t either if you are reading this article.
The truth is it starts to eat away at your soul when you incessantly chase a girl who does not like you back.
With such a tactic, you won’t feel much fulfillment even if you manage to score a girl.
Even worse, you are going to become a man without boundaries which is one of the most unattractive traits you can exhibit as a man.
So, I advise you to decide in advance how much BS you are willing to deal with when you interact with a woman.
And your threshold for tolerating a girl’s BS will become lower and lower as you start to experience more abundance in your dating life.
There simply is no reason for you to hold onto a girl who doesn’t value you when there are tens and hundreds of other girls to choose from.
As I said earlier, you ultimately need to come up with your ‘own’ standard.
But, I’ll tell you the rules I follow, so I can give you some ideas if you are feeling lost.
When you are texting…
Follow the rule of two.
You can text a girl up to two times without receiving her reply.
If a girl still does not text you back after two text messages, it is time to move on.
When you send her that third text message, you are positioning yourself as a desperate loser instead of a persistent pursuer.
Your second text message can simply be asking a girl if she’s okay, or you can give her a closure if you’ve been going out with her for some time.
If you do decide to go with the latter, I advise you to express your genuine feeling so you are not left with any regret.
If you enjoyed spending time with her, then express that to her.
But, you should never make a mistake of begging for her to stay.
If you chase a girl when she is pushing you away, it will only make her want to push you away even further.
You need to step back, so you can give her some space to chase you instead.
In sum, it is perfectly okay to genuinely express how you feel, but it has to be accompanied by your willingness to walk away.
As an example, you can let her know that you enjoy spending time with her, but you wish her the best of luck if she doesn’t feel the same way about you.
When you do this, you are not pushing her away in a malicious way, but rather you are being genuine while setting your boundaries at the same time.
This will make it easier for her to chase if she is on the fence in regards to whether she wants to see you again.
As a side note, there is a lot of misconception about how it is better to be a ‘bad boy’ than a nice guy, to attract girls.
But, I don’t quite agree with that idea.
Based on my experience, nice guys with strong boundaries (and unapologetic with his desires) often consistently get the hottest girls.
So, don’t be afraid to be nice and genuine to women.
You will do just fine as long as you do not show any neediness.
When in person…
Let’s talk about when is the right time to stop chasing a girl in person.
The first thing you want to look out for is her body language.
If her feet are pointed away from you, that is usually an accurate sign that she has no interest in continuing a conversation with you.
Most of us are quite proficient at lying with our words, but we are not very good at lying with our body.
If she says she enjoys talking to you, but her body says otherwise, you know which sign is revealing the truth.
You also want to pay attention to her vocal tonality.
If she maintains an ‘office tonality’ (the type of tonality you would use in a business meeting) when she speaks to you, there is a good chance she is not romantically interested in you.
It is a bad sign if she frequently looks away from you in a conversation.
That being said, there is a small chance she may feel shy, and she is having a difficult time maintaining eye contact if she finds you attractive.
But more often than not, it is an indication that the girl is not interested.
So, is it at all possible to trigger a girl to feel attraction to you when she is not into you, or should you just walk away from her?
My first advice is to find another girl.
But if you so desire, there is one powerful trigger you can utilize to make a girl chase.
One of the best ways to make a girl chase is to utilize social proof.
And when I say social proof, I mean surrounding yourself with attractive girls.
Studies clearly show women generally feel a stronger attraction to a man when they see the man surrounded by attractive women.
Women often look at other women to decide if the man is high value or not.
If you are desired by other attractive women, she is going to believe you must have attractive traits, and your value will become elevated in her eyes.
So, how can you put this into practice?
It is not as complicated as you may think.
If the girl (that you are interested in) is not showing much interest, simply talk to another girl in the surroundings.
This will likely make her crave for your attention.
You obviously need to know how to actually carry a basic conversation with girls to make this work, but it is not as difficult as you may believe.
You just need to keep it playful and friendly (without being too serious), and most girls would be more than happy to chat with you.
Is it possible to make a girl chase in a relationship?
The short answer is yes.
But, I don’t want to talk about any tactics to make your girlfriend chase.
Tactics are not sustainable.
The best way to make a girl chase in a relationship is to become a man of high-value.
If you live a fantastic life with great friends and cool hobbies, then the girl is naturally going to want to be a part of your life.
And if you are a high-value male, your life is not going to revolve around your girl because you do other things with your life besides spending time with her.
The less you become dependent on a girl for your own happiness, the more she will be compelled to chase.
This does not mean you should intentionally push the girl away.
That, in fact, is a sign of emotional weakness because such an act implies you likely believe you are not worthy of a girl’s love.
But rather, you want to express your love as much as you want with the willingness to walk away any time she doesn’t live up to your standard.
Because that is precisely what a high value man with a lot of options would do.